Crypto’s Glorious Comeback: Pal Predicts Valhalla Awaits (with a dash of sarcasm)

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In an utterly befuddling display of optimism unlikely to convince even the most die-hard optimists, Raoul Pal, CEO of Real Vision, has proclaimed that the “Road to Valhalla is getting very close.” Apparently, the crypto industry’s endless rollercoaster is nearing the top of the mountain-though one suspects the summit is obscured by clouds of smoke and the occasional clown car. 🚀🤡

Pal’s Pandemic of Positivity

“Simply put,” says Pal with a tone of conviction that makes you wonder if he’s been sniffing the same proverbial glue, “the crypto industry will soon begin an uptrend following its recent series of spectacular market tantrums.” The kind of optimism that makes you raise an eyebrow and ask, “Really, Raoul, do tell?”

He duly acknowledges the current pain points-namely, a U.S. government shutdown tightening liquidity like a corset on a Victorian lady. Taxes still flow, but spending has dried up faster than a desert rain. Meanwhile, the Treasury’s General Account (TGA) is creeping perilously close to $1 trillion, which, if you’re into that sort of thing, is a major reason for Bitcoin’s recent underperformance compared to stalwart treasuries. 💰

In a frantic attempt to keep the show on the road, the Federal Reserve has been forced to dust off its Overnight Repo magic hat, planning to inject a princely sum of $30 billion into the market-because, evidently, liquidity is the new black.

“I know no one wants to hear bullish ideas and everyone is scared and wants to fling poo at each other… but the Road to Valhalla is getting very close. If global liquidity is the single most dominant macro factor, then we MUST focus on that.”

– Raoul Pal (@RaoulGMI) November 4, 2025

The Bullish Horizon: Government Spree and Liquidity Booty

The next act in this circus will be marked by the Treasury’s pledge to loosen its purse strings-spending a hefty $250 billion to $350 billion as soon as the government shutdown is a thing of the past. When that happens, Quantitative Tightening (QT) goes on vacation, and balance sheets expand faster than a gossip column’s list of rumors. Liquidity, once scant, would flow freer than a novelist’s pen on a rainy afternoon. 📈

Historical trends suggest that when the Treasury’s reserves are replenished and liquidity becomes as tight as a well-worn shoe, it often signals that the market’s pendulum is about to swing back the other way-fingers crossed, or as they say in Wall Street, “buy the dip.”

Regulation: The Unicorn in the Crypto Fair

Pal waxes lyrical about the potential salvation that meaningful regulation could bring, primarily the much-hyped CLARITY Act. Passing this would give banks and wirehouses a green light to custody and trade crypto at scale, transforming the scene into something resembling legitimate finance rather than a wild frontier where cows run free and regulators are mostly just a myth. 🏦

The bill, which breezed through the House on July 17, 2025, and is now idling in the Senate, promises a brighter future for crypto-assuming it survives the political naysayers and the inevitable filibuster. Expect the passage before New Year’s Eve, perhaps delivered with a bow and a flourish. 🎁

He also mentions the “Big Beautiful Bill,” a budget restructuring masterpiece that’s meant to propel the economy into the midterms-and possibly disrupt the space-time continuum of market predictability itself. After all, what’s more fun than risk assets doing flip-flops on the legislative trampoline? 🤹‍♂️

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2025-11-05 14:13