Minority Mindset

The settlement, which resembles the sort of financial largesse one might expect from a benevolent uncle after a particularly raucous family gathering, amounts to a cool $400,000. This princely sum is destined for those poor souls whose personally identifiable information was unceremoniously laid bare-things like names, social security numbers, and even account numbers, all thanks to an unauthorized individual who, in a burst of sheer audacity, accessed a bank email account between May 13th and May 16th of 2024. One must wonder what this individual was thinking: perhaps they fancied themselves a modern-day Robin Hood, but without the charm or the noble intent.

Now, however, the price has retreated some forty percent from that peak, causing many a nervous investor to clutch their pearls. Mr. Ali Martinez, a gentleman of some repute in these financial circles, has kindly provided his observations, highlighting certain price levels upon which the hopes of the bullish speculators now rest. One wonders if such prognostications are worth the paper they are written on… or, rather, the digital space they occupy.

In the frozen tundra of the digital age, where trust is currency and hope is a deprecated protocol, a man of hubris sent his life’s savings into the void. With the precision of a gulag accountant and the faith of a Soviet dissident, he copied a wallet address-nearly, but not quite, the one he intended-and … Read more

On Friday, the SEC rolled out the big guns-proposed final consent judgments in a New York court, which basically means they’re about to tell these guys, “You’re guilty, but let’s make it official.” The charges against Ellison and Wang actually first appeared around Christmas 2022 (cheerful holiday news!), while Singh’s got his name in the mix since February 2023. Santa definitely dropped the bad news this year. 🎅🕵️‍♂️

Now, they’re offering $400,000 to make it all better. $400,000. That’s…something. It works out to roughly the cost of a small island if you ignore the buying part, or, you know, a slightly above-average luxury watch. They’re calling it a settlement, which is a polite way of saying “we messed up, but aren’t taking full responsibility.” 😇