You Won’t Believe Who’s Stealing Billions in Crypto (And Why World Leaders Are Freaking Out)

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If you have ever wondered what happens when seven of the world’s most powerful countries get together in a picturesque corner of Canada (known for moose, maple syrup, and apologies), you probably didn’t expect the conversation to turn to—you guessed it—North Korean crypto hackers. Yet here we are. Bloomberg, ever the bearer of dramatic news, suggests that the G7 summit may bravely shoulder the task of talking about the digital equivalent of ninjas: North Korea’s elite league of keyboard warriors, who have haunted cryptoland like ghosts wearing tracksuits since 2014.

G7 Attempts to Stop North Korea’s Crypto Heists—Or at Least Complain About Them

This isn’t just idle gossip over cocktails and canapés. Oh, no. The Bloomberg blog post slaps us with a hint that the crypto industry’s number one bogeyman (move over, Bitcoin volatility) may finally get the limelight—North Korean hackers. There’s always a chance the G7 leaders get distracted by a moose stampede, but the matter at hand is serious enough to warrant at least one PowerPoint presentation, if not a strongly worded group photo.

In case you forgot your atlas, the G7 is the VIP guest list of United States, United Kingdom, Canada, France, Germany, Italy, and Japan—all ready to descend on Alberta, Canada, in June 2025. Imagine the conversations: “So, about North Korea embargoing our crypto wallets. Thoughts?” Right alongside their boilerplate debates about Russia, trade wars, and who brought the best maple cookies.

Experts have sounded alarm bells louder than a toddler with a new whistle. Even the White House piped up to declare that North Korea is using pilfered crypto to buy, well, things you really don’t want your next-door neighbor to own. (Hint: not bouncy castles. Think boomier.) 🚀

Why North Korean Hackers Make Even G7 Leaders Nervous (Hint: Billions, Not Bitcoin Pizza)

North Korea’s crypto hacking empire has been picking pockets across the globe for a decade now—long enough to have its own embarrassing high school yearbook photos. Their latest all-inclusive getaway: Bybit in 2025, where they pocketed a cool $1.5 billion. In 2024 alone, they managed nearly 47 hacking incidents. That’s more attempts than an average person makes at Wordle before breakfast (with slightly higher stakes).

The fun doesn’t stop there. These hackers moonlight in China and Russia under fake IDs that could make even your cat’s Instagram profile look authentic. At one point, a North Korean hotshot even tried to get hired at Kraken, the crypto exchange, under a totally fake name—nobody suspected a thing until he suggested replacing two-factor authentication with “guess the password.”

The big takeaway is that the G7 would really like to slap together some robust cybersecurity blueprints and maybe, just maybe, keep their crypto snug and safe from North Korea’s weapon wish list. Of course, nobody actually knows what will make the final cut for the agenda. For all we know, they could spend the whole time arguing over which country really invented French fries.

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2025-05-08 11:24