When DeFi Turns to De-Funded: $260M Vanishes into Digital Abyss! 🚀💸

In the muddy trenches of the blockchain battlefield, Cetus, a noble yet naive decentralized exchange on the Sui front, fell victim to the crude hand of the shadowy hacker. Over two hundred and sixty million dollars—an enormous heap of virtual currency—disappeared faster than a bureaucrat with a bribe, leaving behind only the echoes of greed and despair.

According to the brave on-chain investigator Lookonchain—an investigator in the truest sense, for he feeds on chaos—the villain swapped the stolen loot into USDC, then bridged a tidy sixty million to Ethereum, like a thief ferrying his treasure across borders to escape the chaos. The attacker, cunning as the fox in a henhouse, already spent nearly fifty-eight million USDC buying up Ethereum at what was probably a bargain at the time, because who doesn’t love a good fire sale?

Meanwhile, the Sui tokens—those digital tulips—collapsed like a house of cards in a hurricane. Assets such as LBTC and AXOL, once shining stars in the crypto sky, now lay dormant in complete insignificance. Other tokens—LOFI, HIPPO, and SQUIRT—plunged over 80%, as if the market itself had gone mad—perhaps rightfully so. DEX Screener, that tired watchdog, recounts the tragedy.

Cetus, in a show of noble responsibility, admitted the breach through their official X account—probably Twitter’s forgotten stepchild—and promptly paused their smart contracts, like a parent scolding a mischievous child. An internal investigation was launched, because what better way to deal with chaos than to hit pause and sip lukewarm coffee?

“There was an incident detected on our protocol, and our smart contract has been paused temporarily for safety. The team is investigating the incident at the moment. A further investigation statement will be made soon. We are grateful for your patience.”

Onchain Lens, never one to miss a chance for speculation, claimed that the attacker had taken control of all the liquidity pools in SUI—those delicate reservoirs of hope—and drained them dry, a digital Pompeii of misplaced faith.

Meanwhile, CZ of Binance, probably the only level-headed soul in this chaos, tweeted his support to the Sui team—pat on the back for bravely losing millions in a game where no one really wins, except perhaps the hackers.

2025-05-22 16:12

When DeFi Turns to De-Funded: $260M Vanishes into Digital Abyss! 🚀💸

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