When Crypto Met Politics: Ripples, Dollars, and Poultry Drama!

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Ah, the grand spectacle of President Trump’s second term dawns upon us — not with the quiet dignity of a Russian winter, but with the clamor and chaos of a bustling market bazaar! Bitcoin, our modern-day golden calf, danced wildly from dizzying heights of $109,000 to the somber lows near $70,000, as if caught in the tempestuous hands of Trump’s tariffs and the global trade squabbles that make even the stoutest merchant’s beard tremble. 🤯

In this cacophony of economic uncertainty, one might imagine the regulators, those sober guardians of order, forging alliances with crypto titans, yet the world’s mercantile struggles cast a shadow where only hobgoblins dwell. 📉

But lo! The FEC scrolls reveal a curious truth—millions of shiny digital coins poured into the treasury of Trump’s inauguration festivities! Not a mere trifle, but an opulent $18 million donated by the crypto clans and their leaderly chieftains, as if buying favor at the Emperor’s grand feast. 🤑

crypto companies and execs donated $18 million to trump’s inauguration fund, according to sunday’s FEC filing:

— Ben Weiss (@bdanweiss) April 21, 2025

Ripple’s Largesse: $5 Million and Counting

Among the flock, Solana Labs flapped in with a humble $1 million, while lesser-known knights like Uniswap’s Hayden Adams tossed in $245,000, and Consensys sprinkled $100,000 like breadcrumbs for the crows. But the true lord of largesse was none other than Ripple Labs, generously parting with about $5 million—more than some kingdoms yield in a season! Only Pilgrim’s Pride Corp, those poultry overlords, pecked deeper into their coffers.

In the shadow of Trump’s triumph and the revelation of these numbers on the 20th of April, the Republican party’s treasure chest swelled by nearly $239 million—a sum that would make even the most avaricious merchant grin like a cat with cream. Coinbase, Kraken, Robinhood, and their ilk stormed in with seven-figure gifts, joined by the titans Meta, PayPal, Apple, and others—truly a veritable feast of wealth and influence! 🍽️

The Trump administration, taking a stance friendlier than a tavern-baron to crypto, has seen the SEC back away from lawsuits as if tripping over their own robes, granting reprieves to the giants of crypto commerce. And the President himself promised a grand new vault—a strategic U.S. cryptocurrency reserve! Imagine a vault brimming with Bitcoin, Ether, XRP, Solana, and Cardano, guarded by the sternest dragons of finance. 🐉

The Curious Case of XRP’s Tepid Dance

Yet, despite the fanfare, XRP’s price remains stubbornly unhurried, trading languidly at $2.10—down nearly one percent in a day, and over three over the week. Like a reluctant horse at the start line, it waits for the trumpets that never quite sound loud enough, despite CEO Garlinghouse and CLO Alderoty hobnobbing with the President himself. Sometimes, even the mightiest tide refuses to rise. 🍂

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2025-04-22 14:16