When Crypto Meets Trump: The Most Awkward Week Ever! 🚀😱

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Ah, what a week it has been in the whimsical world of cryptocurrency! While the prices might resemble a rollercoaster designed by a particularly mischievous raccoon, the macro-level happenings are more like a cosmic dance of progress that everyone has been waiting for. Currently, the total crypto market cap is lounging around a cozy $3.8 trillion, but let’s not rush; after all, it’s not like we’re trying to catch a bus that leaves every hour.

Now, right at the start of the week, in a move that shocked absolutely no one, Donald Trump took the oath of office, officially becoming the 47th president of the United States. This momentous occasion unleashed a chain reaction of events that could potentially reshape the industry—like a butterfly flapping its wings and accidentally causing a hurricane in the crypto world.

Immediately, Trump went to his desk and signed an executive order, which, among other things, set up a working group on Digital Asset Markets. The aim? To explore the idea of creating a national cryptocurrency stockpile. Yes, you heard that right! Some folks thought he might actually consider buying Bitcoin for the government, but in reality, the order was more about not selling the crypto that had been confiscated. So, essentially, it’s like saying, “We won’t sell our old toys; we’ll just keep them in the attic.”

But wait, there’s more! This executive order also aims to keep central bank digital currencies at bay to protect the dollar’s throne. It even includes a mandate for easier access to the banking system for individuals and crypto companies. So, operation Chokepoint 2.0? Halted! It’s like a superhero movie, but with more spreadsheets.

As if that wasn’t enough excitement, Trump appointed Mark Uyeda as the interim Chairman of the Securities and Exchange Commission. And guess who’s heading a task force to create a fair and transparent framework for digital assets? None other than Commissioner Hester Peirce, affectionately dubbed Crypto Mom. Because what’s a crypto revolution without a mom to keep things in check?

All in all, it was a splendid week for crypto fundamentals, even if the prices were more like a sad trombone sound effect. Most coins are charting losses, except for BTC, which decided to throw a little party with a 2% increase. 🎉

Market Data

Market Cap: $3.801T | 24H Vol: $213B | BTC Dominance: 55.3%

BTC: $106,100 (+2%) | ETH: $3,397 (-0.7%) | XRP: $3.16 (-1.3%)

This Week’s Crypto Headlines You Can’t Miss

Trump Signs Executive Order For National Digital Asset Stockpile: Report. In what can only be described as a headline that could make a cat laugh, President Trump signed an executive order to review the creation of a ‘National Digital Asset Stockpile.’ This, paired with Senator Cynthia Lummis’ new role as chair of the Senate Banking Subcommittee on Digital Assets, had Changpeng Zhao declaring that the BTC reserve is ‘pretty much confirmed.’

Donald Trump Pardons Silk Road Creator Ross Ulbricht. In a move that makes you question the universe’s sense of humor, Trump officially pardoned Ross Ulbricht, the infamous Silk Road founder. Ulbricht had been enjoying a long vacation behind bars for about a decade, but hey, who needs rules in this wild west of digital currency?

SEC Revokes SAB 121, Paving the Way for Banks to Hold Crypto. More favorable news emerged from the new administration as the SEC decided to overturn the controversial SAB 121. It’s like they finally realized that banks holding crypto might not be the worst idea since sliced bread.

Trump Names Uyeda and Pham as Interim SEC and CFTC Leaders. The shakeup continued with the appointment of Mark Uyeda as the interim Chair of the SEC and Caroline Pham to lead the CFTC. Because if there’s one thing we need, it’s more people with fancy titles in the crypto circus.

Trump Downplays Meme Coin Profits in First Statement After Launch. The crypto world was sent into a tizzy with the launch of two official meme coins by the dynamic duo of Trump and the First Lady. But when asked about the profits, Trump downplayed it like a toddler avoiding broccoli. 🍔

Here’s What CryptoQuant’s IBCI Signals for Bitcoin’s Next Move. Bitcoin went on a wild ride this week, slipping below $100,000 before soaring to a new all-time high above $109,000 on inauguration day. Since then, it’s calmed down, but there are warning signs that this bull run might take a nap soon. 🐂💤

Charts

This week, we have a chart analysis of Ethereum, Ripple, Cardano, Binance Coin, and Solana – click here for the complete price analysis. Because who doesn’t love a good chart to spice up their day?

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2025-01-24 20:09