Somewhere out in the bracken tangle of economics and desire, Bitcoin—the luckless, hungry wolf of the money world—lifted its nose and caught a new scent blowing east from Washington. Old Donald Trump, fidgety and volatile as a spring river, tossed a $6 billion trade deal at the Brits and let the tariff dogs take their rest for a moment. You could almost hear the traders howl—well, some of them, anyway. Others just muttered and watched the charts like men studying cloud patterns to guess where the rain might fall next.
Where the Highs Still Make Men Dizzy—Bitcoin Stands Tallish
Folks who thought the fizz had gone out of Bitcoin got a surprise. Last few months, when Trump was slinging tariffs like eggs at a county fair, the price of Bitcoin rolled downhill, gathering mud till it sat at $74,000. That was down a quarter from the grand mountaintop of $109,000. People were nervous. They should’ve been. There’s always another way for things to fall apart.
But how fortunes turn! Just as the sheepdogs of Wall Street were ready to declare it dead, along came that glorious pause in the tariff two-step and a wad of UK cash. In a blink, Bitcoin surged up 31% over the moon and back again, now only some 6% shy of its old record. That bounce would kneecap a grasshopper. Antoni Trenchev—the sort of fellow who watches numbers jump for fun—chalked up Bitcoin’s grit:
“Bitcoin’s back at $100,000 like a coyote coming in out of the storm, claiming its ground with a snarl—proving, once again, you can’t keep a good meme down.”
Other coins weren’t exactly twiddling their silicon thumbs either. Ethereum finally dragged itself above $2,000, climbing 12% in a day. Dogecoin, never one to let somebody else have the last woof, jumped 11% too. Trenchev gave the credit to pro-crypto politicians and spot ETF folks with deep pockets and presumably even deeper FOMO. There was a note of glee in his words—Bitcoin stomping all over the US stock market benchmarks like a bull who found the corn stash.
The Wolves at the Gate: Trouble Brewing (Surprised? 🐺)
Of course, there’s always somebody whispering that night is coming. Trenchev (again—this man talks like he’s paid by the syllable) said that global nonsense—wars, rumors of wars, money getting itchy, nerves jangled—could still put a dent in this gold rush. India and Pakistan grumble at each other like neighbors over a broken fence. The Fed sits with its hand on the interest rate lever, terrified of inflation, unemployment, and probably bad sushi.
Since those first tariffs smacked the ground in April, Bitcoin bounced 16%. Gold—bless it, that ancient doom metal—crept up 6%. The S&P 500? That grand old ship has made about as much progress as a herd of turtles in a molasses field.
Analysts, like prophets reading chicken entrails, say Bitcoin’s next trick will require it to leap beyond that $109,350 January peak to prove it’s more than just a wild guess. For now, it’ll probably loiter between $70K and $109K like a drifter between paydays until politicians finish arguing about who gets the last piece of pie.
Still, even the crankiest old-timer couldn’t help but tip his hat at $100,000. “Last month, it was sitting in the ditch at $74,000, begging for scraps. Buying when everyone else was running for the hills? That takes either guts or a touch of lunacy—same as always,” Trenchev said, probably with a twinkle in his eye and a brand-new pocket calculator at the ready. 🚀💰
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2025-05-09 09:33