The Valley Recap: Image Rehab

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In my opinion, it wasn’t necessary for the show to present such an extended episode focusing on Jax’s emergence from rehab, only to demonstrate that he has undergone significant change, much like the stone-faced figures on Mount Rushmore. To put it another way, we certainly didn’t need this, and let’s take a moment to consider some of his questionable statements as evidence, shall we? Among them, my favorite is when he says, “I just left rehab. I want to go out.” This remark was made in relation to the party that Jesse is organizing for his boyfriend, Benji, who has returned from his self-imposed exile in Canada’s chilly north. (Personally, I think making it the 51st state would solve a lot of immigration issues for Jesse.) Yes, you guessed it – Jax’s first thought upon returning home was how he could attend this party where alcohol and other substances are served – not long after getting a fresh haircut and a touch-up on his Botox, of course.

It’s important to note that Jax has made it clear that he is not giving up alcohol, but rather choosing not to drink at the moment. However, he plans on resuming his drinking habits in the future. This situation might be seen as a personal decision rather than a promise or a threat.

Jax’s relationship with alcohol is similar to someone who is temporarily abstaining from sweets due to acne issues. Yet, much like that person would eventually return to their sweet treats, Jax intends to go back to drinking. The problem isn’t the alcohol; it’s his anger that he considers his “drug of choice.”

Given his struggles with alcohol, it might be best for him to avoid social situations such as parties for now. Perhaps he could consider alternative activities like attending a sound bath or even getting a Vampire Facial instead. These suggestions are offered with the hope that they could provide him with some relaxation and self-care in the meantime.

The quote takes place after Jesse leaves Jax at home, and he decides it’s time to sell the house he shares with Brittany – despite not making mortgage payments for some time and referring to it as “his” house. He suggests they should list the large five-bedroom, seven-bath property immediately, stating, “A woman with a child doesn’t need such a big house like this; something more manageable for a woman would be better.”

Jesse thinks Brittany, being a woman and a mother, should sell their large house because it’s too much to handle. However, his reasoning seems unclear since Brittany has been managing the payments and cleaning on her own.

Jax’s latest statement seems like another instance of his misunderstanding common phrases, such as when he uses “full custody” or “partook,” which aren’t commonly used words. This tendency is evident in his accusations against Brittany, claiming she’s keeping “his son” from him. What he actually meant was that despite following all her requests, he isn’t receiving any rewards or benefits in return. He seems to believe that lacking a “leg to stand on” means being denied something, unaware that it literally means having no basis or support for his claims. Not only is this man problematic, but he also appears to lack intellectual depth.

This episode featured a few events unrelated to Jax, with one particularly unfortunate incident being Jesse denying Isabella the chance to see her ailing grandmother. However, this week, let’s concentrate on what Jax desires most and delve deeply into his storyline. Rest assured, we won’t be offering any positive remarks about him.

In this passage, I’ll focus on praising others, starting with Kristen Doute, who consistently astounds me with her level-headedness in the cast. When Jax expresses his anger about Brittany and the group taking over his bar for a day, turning it into “Britt’s” temporarily, Kristen calmly says, “It was fun and funny. Let her have her moment.” In response, Jax argues that she had her moment for 30 days while he was away. However, considering the fact that during his time in rehab, he wasn’t paying the mortgage, taking care of their child, or respecting her privacy by spying on her and sending angry texts, it seems rather unfair to call that “her moment.” He then suggests that Kristen must have been spending a lot of time with Cruz. This prompts Kristen to assert that he should never question her methods of raising their son because she’s the one doing most of the work – financially, emotionally, and practically. I can’t help but agree with her on this point. Despite Jax referring to their son as “my son,” it seems clear that Kristen is carrying the majority of the parenting responsibility.

The gathering at Jesse’s place is bustling, surprisingly so given the mystery surrounding the front door. Yet, no one appears keen on crossing paths with Jax. At some point, he was spotted in the kitchen next to Scott, who goes by Jesse’s “life coach.” Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. Keep that walking infomercial for dietary supplements away from Jax! We don’t need him making Jax even more of a handful than he already is. These two are planning to start a podcast that could potentially see the spirit of Chuck Woolery in the White House.

Thankfully, another person shows up in the kitchen who is skilled at dealing with Jax, and it’s none other than Zack. Remarkably, the transformation of first-season antagonist Zack into a hero is quite evident as he effortlessly takes down Jax, much like opening another can of Monster Energy from his branded fridge on the counter. Everything that Jax says, Zack has a response for. He ridicules Jax’s subpar rehab that allowed him to leave and go to the house; he teases Jax for constantly spying on Brittany and texting her; he accuses him of not taking any of the therapy he attended seriously. All these points are well-founded. When Jax claims they won’t bring up things he did five years ago, Zack counters that he’s bringing up things he did just a few days ago.

Not for the past month it wasn’t!” What a burn!

Despite Tom Schwartz’s history of associating with unsavory characters, he surprisingly tells Jax the truth. During the move from Jax’s house to the townhouse adjacent to Schwartz’s, Jax mentions that he won’t yield to Brittany’s demands until she allows him to see “his son”. Jason advises against this, and Tom suggests, “Just say, ‘Yes, anything you want. Done.'” Indeed, the key to winning over Brittany seems to be treating her kindly, a lesson Jax apparently hasn’t learned yet despite his rehab stint. It’s perplexing how someone as astute as Schwartz can maintain friendships with such questionable individuals on Bravo. It’s almost like Yoda working at Miramax!

As a film critic, I must confess, nobody handles Jax quite like Brittany does. She shrewdly exposes how he perpetually casts himself as the victim in his own narrative. Her most effective critique comes when she unveils Frank Dremon, Jax’s Finsta, created to shower himself with positive comments on social media. “A legend,” Frank declared on a post about Jax entering rehab. He even defended Jax in comment sections, pretending to be his ally.

When Brittany shares this account with Janet, she uncovers an alarming detail: Jax was using this Finsta to directly message Brittany as if it were his own account. This crosses the line between odd and heartbreaking. And it does so effortlessly. This is where we find Jax now – devoid of self-control, bereft of friends, lacking support, and anything resembling societal functionality. He’s stooping so low as to impersonate another man just to defend himself, because no one else seems willing or able. What kind of individual would resort to such desperate measures? It’s a chilling thought indeed.

The most poignant moment arrives as Jax steps into his fresh dwelling, when there’s a rap at the door and a document server presents him with a manila folder. This has something to do with our podcast, he ponders. What? Did he cause trouble for the podcast again? Is another lawsuit on the horizon? Yet, it turns out to be divorce papers. The relationship is over for Jax. Whether it’s his show, his fame, or his life, things are falling apart bit by bit. In the kitchen, he battles back tears and suppresses his anger, yet neither emotion can save him. Only change can help him, but that idea seems as distant and daunting as ever. Instead of brainstorming ways to enhance, showing empathy, and applying the Golden Rule we learned in school, he’s merely gazing at that envelope, contemplating how long it will take for his golf cart battery to recharge.

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2025-06-18 05:54