As a seasoned divorce attorney, I’ve seen my fair share of tumultuous relationships, but none quite like those featured in this reality show. It seems that every couple has their own set of unique challenges, from the physically fit J.R., who sprays cologne on his manhood for all to smell, to Aria and Caleb, whose bond remains unclear despite their heartwarming moments together.
Friends, today we’re diving into an intriguing linguistic concept: the term “uncomfortability“. Over time, I’ve noticed that this word and its opposite, “comfortability,” have been recurring themes in various dating series, from the well-known “The Bachelor” to the more recent Netflix production, “The Ultimatum“, where six couples experiment with partner swapping to decide whether they want to get engaged or call it quits.
What are these hybrid words trying to convey? Are they awkward attempts to replace “unease” and “ease,” or do they suggest unique feelings? Maybe “comfortability” refers to the capacity to feel comfortable in a situation. If that’s correct, then I can attest that the latest season of Ultimatum does, undeniably, take us to what one contestant describes as the edge of discomfort. In truth, four competitors reportedly struggled so much to find comfort that they departed the show prematurely without providing an explanation – only a brief on-screen message stating that they “quietly met” off-camera and chose to abandon their trial partners without notice.
In a similar vein to Netflix dating series like “Love Is Blind,” this mid-season turn of events follows a pattern seen in other shows where one couple unexpectedly split without a clear reason before the reunion, leaving viewers puzzled. Despite the advantage of flexibility, it’s perplexing why things unfolded this way, especially considering how smoothly one of the trial couples appeared to be functioning. However, that’s the nature of reality TV dating – not everyone is prepared for the discomfort, as our host Nick Lachey puts it. Alright, let’s dive in and explore more about this development.
After two years together, Mariah (24) is more than ready for Caleb (29) to pop the question. However, Caleb feels overwhelmed by the depth of Mariah’s affection and worries that he might not be able to express why they make a perfect match. Despite acknowledging Mariah’s deep-rooted insecurities, which appear to originate from a difficult relationship with her mother, their bond appears strong overall.
It could simply be that these two share a resemblance, similar to couples often do, or maybe their harmonious vibe is just too perfect. Frankly, I find it hard to imagine them parting ways. Mariah manages the change with such grace, and Caleb appears dedicated to using this experience for self-improvement – not a “hall pass.” However, let’s talk about individuals who might not have the best intentions…
It’s quite possible that Zaina (aged 32) and J.R. (aged 33) may exit the show as a couple, but I don’t hold much hope for their future together. J.R., being the son of a pastor, got married at an early age of 22 to his long-time girlfriend, primarily due to their decision to wait until it was “right” to consummate their relationship. Their marriage ended in divorce, with infidelity on his ex’s part. Now, J.R. harbors a fear of entering into another marital commitment.
One question, though: If J.R. is sooooo afraid of infidelity, why did he agree to join a show where the explicit goal is partner swapping with a high probability of philandering? Why does he seem the most enthusiastic about sanctioned stepping out? And why, pray tell, did this man of god choose a trial partner whose eyes make him think he’d be “guaranteed passionate sex”? I wonder…
Nick and Sandy carry an air of destiny, not only due to Nick being 38, who refers to himself as the “Golden Ultimatum,” but also because Sandy is 27.
Nick, an artist, has lived in Los Angeles for over a decade but yearns for a tranquil lakeside setting to establish his roots. Contrarily, Sandy continues to embrace the vibrant nightlife of LA. In Nick’s own words, “She’s still living it up at Coachella, while I’m wrangling horses at Stagecoach.” He adores her deeply, and it seems their bond started with him being the person she’d call after a wild night out when they first crossed paths. (I must admit, envisioning that initial encounter is beyond me, and even powerful hallucinogens might not be enough to conjure such an image.)
Despite how enamored Nick appears to be, there’s a nagging suspicion within me that he’s merely an acquaintance of Sandy from her younger days, whose charm might be fading as she grows older.
It’s becoming clear to me that I might be leaning towards the assumption that all couples on this show will (or should) part ways, but I’ll courageously persist in trusting my instincts. Scotty (30 years old) and Aria (25 years old) appear to be out of sync. They reside in separate cities, and while Aria maintains a guarded demeanor, Scotty exhibits an intense personality. Aria claims she’s at the pinnacle of her career (we’re unsure what field that might be), and she’s determined not to make any decisions based solely on a man’s influence. On the other hand, Scotty seems convinced that he’s under constant scrutiny due to some past unpleasant experiences with men. However, it should be noted that these two do share some common interests, such as perhaps an affection for under-eye moisturizing patches?
From my perspective as a devoted admirer, I’d predict they might get engaged, yet it would leave me astonished if they were still an item by the time we reunite.
As a movie buff, let me tell you, Vanessa and Dave are an intriguing duo that left me scratching my head about how they ended up here. Dave, aged 34, seems to believe that Vanessa, 30, is in a bit of a hurry to get engaged, while he himself takes his time making decisions. On the other hand, he’s itching to leave this reality show, and there are whispers among fellow cast members that he was eager to propose almost as soon as he arrived. These two play a pivotal role in an intense plot twist, but here’s the gist: I suspect Dave decided to commit to Vanessa during their time on the show.
The Trial Marriage
On this program, couples come together for one of two purposes: Either they believe they can assist each other’s personal growth, or they are attracted to each other. In the case of Mariah and Micah, they belong to the former group. There’s no romantic tension between them; instead, they are focused on understanding their wants and improving themselves for potential future partners. If you’re genuinely committed to your long-term partner, this is the respectful approach, but it might not make for very exciting television.
Until. UNTIL! The season’s Big Twist™. Just one week into the trial marriage phase, two couples leave out of nowhere: Micah and Chanel and Dave and Vanessa. This leaves Mariah and Nick on their own, and while Mariah handles it like a champ, Nick … doesn’t.
Regarding Chanel, Micah, and particularly Dave, their early departures might be the reason we don’t see much of them, but I was hoping for more screen time with Dave because the producers seem to have given him a deceptive portrayal. When Dave attempts to intimidate Vanessa, his girlfriend, by hinting at feelings for Mariah, she responds calmly: “She’s 24.” His claim of being very smooth during his solo phase is followed immediately by a clip of him on a date where he makes the questionable comment, “You’re from L.A., right? … Yeah, it’s hot there in the summer.” I find myself captivated by this continuous display.
In reality, Chanel finds Dave’s humor amusing, yet it doesn’t stop him from deciding to depart earlier. From his demeanor and remarks made by his fellow cast members, it seems as though the sight of Vanessa dating has given him a significant jolt, leading him to make a hasty commitment.
Vanessa and Nick
I think having a trial couple named “Vanessa” and “Nick” might’ve broken this show’s Lachey-hosted Matrix. These two hit it off in a scary kind of way but end on a big question mark. They’re both art school dropouts who grew up homeschooled. In fine millennial form, they both like comparing themselves to onions. When asked during a game who most intimidates him, Nick quietly tells Vanessa that it’s her — which clearly turns her on. When she laughs at Nick’s jokes, she really laughs.
However, things take an unexpected turn: The trial marriage appears to be thriving when all of a sudden, we’re informed through captions that Vanessa, Dave, Chanel, and Micah had clandestine meetings off-camera and decided to depart without any prior notice or farewells. This happened out of the blue! While Mariah focuses her energy on reading Jay Shetty’s “8 Rules of Love” and venting her anger through boxing, Nick pours his feelings into a massive painting that leaves stains around it and becomes fixated on Sandy and J.R. Needless to say, this doesn’t end well.
In each new season, it’s one relationship that gets too entangled in dramatic situations. Although none of the couples have reached the tumultuous intensity of relationships like Rae and Jake from the first season or Yoly and Xander from “Queer Love”, Sandy and J.R. definitely create a lot of turmoil. Being Scorpios, J.R. confesses to Sandy that he’s always wanted to be with someone born under this sign. They only learn each other’s real names, Sandra and Jon Richard, after they’re already engaged. During lunch with Sandy’s mother, J.R.’s lunch companion subtly criticizes Nick for not contributing enough in the relationship. Upon learning that J.R. met Sandy’s mom, an upset Nick arrives at the trial couple’s door, causing a commotion. They slam the door in his face, leaving him to lament loudly for the cameras. Oh boy, it’s quite a mess!!!
It’s puzzling to me how these two behave. They practice prayer before dinner, and J.R. seems to suggest that a woman can post her partner on social media, but it’s not right for a man to be obligated to do so. He teases J.R. about being unaware of her taste, yet he tells Zaina they aren’t really dating; he’s merely learning from her to take back home. Frankly, I’m doubting that she’s certain about their relationship status!
At the gathering of friends, Nick expresses his regret to J.R., who reveals that Nick’s late-night visit has cost him all respect. However, the most intriguing exchange occurs when J.R. mentions a gossip about Scotty claiming he’s on the show for a “pass” to cheat on Zaina. Scotty is eager to know the source of this rumor, and when Nick directly asks J.R. if he’s involved with Sandy, J.R. cleverly sidesteps the question by interpreting it as an inquiry about sharing a bed. The situation seems to be a tangled web of emotions for everyone involved.
The relationship between Zaina and Scotty starts off positively, but it soon becomes problematic. At first, Scotty believes that Zaina is the perfect match, and at a certain point, Zaina tells her friends that if J.R. proposed after spending time with Scotty, she wouldn’t say yes. However, everyone knows that Scotty has a short temper; when Aria expresses sadness about Scotty flirting with Zaina during the dating phase, he angrily reprimands her for being disrespectful. And when Zaina rejects two date ideas — a hot air balloon ride because she’s afraid of heights and cryotherapy due to her dislike of cold temperatures — Scotty becomes cold-hearted. Then, he finds out that she ate without him and angrily declares: “This is not the type of partner I was looking for in a trial wife; someone who simply eats without me.
Regardless of how things turn out with Zaina, Scotty will likely have some ’splaining to do when he reunites with Aria. She said she’d be upset if he spent Night One in bed with his trial wife instead of taking the couch, and, well, he definitely did not sleep on the couch.
Among the fresh relationships this season, Aria and Caleb’s appears to be the most sincere. They communicate honestly and compassionately about their significant others. He purchases a spa set for her and partakes in face masks (and under-eye patches) with her. They engage in “Chubby Bunny,” a game I haven’t considered since my Girl Scout days, and create s’mores. When Aria confesses that expressing physical affection is challenging for her, Caleb gently takes her hand, meets her gaze, and smiles warmly. Adorable!!!
As a movie connoisseur, it’s clear to me these two have different interpretations of their connection. Aria sees it as a bond that’s evolved from something platonic into something deeper, while Caleb maintains they’re just friends. But when Caleb tried to explain this to Scotty, he wasn’t buying it. He claimed no straight man has ever looked at Aria and only wanted friendship. I guess I don’t subscribe to the idea portrayed in “When Harry Met Sally” about heterosexual friendships, so I believe Caleb is telling the truth. Here’s hoping Aria understands that the sense of security and acceptance she feels with Caleb should be present in any relationship, whether it’s romantic or not.
Notes for the Divorce Lawyers
• J.R. works hard to maintain his eight-pack (as in, he weighs his food while dining out), and as one might expect, he’s damn proud of his physique. In a pseudo #grwm video, he flexes while telling us, “This was earned, not given.” He then proceeds to show us how he spritzes cologne all over his body, including on his balls. Thanks, J.R.!
Every season, our trial couples are offered progressively more comfortable options for sleeping apart from sharing a bed. In the first season, it seemed like there was no alternative sleeping space available. The second season introduced an air mattress for Antonio. This season appears to have pull-out couches as well. Although the makeshift pillow fortifications from previous seasons were amusing, this new arrangement seems more conducive to everyone’s health. It would be great if we could make sure to remove all furniture assembly stickers before filming begins…
I find it intriguing, and maybe revealing, that I don’t see Nick as a suitable spouse – a viewpoint I felt compelled to express to Sandy following our shared single experiences together.
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2024-12-04 15:55