The Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: Green With Envy

As a longtime fan of the Real Housewives of New Jersey, I’ve grown accustomed to the rollercoaster ride of emotions that comes with each season. But this one has been particularly wild, even for RHONJ standards.

Among the cast members in this television show, Dolores Catania is the only one who appears to be making sense. Akin to a Roman goddess brought to life amongst us, she expresses her frustration at Melissa’s Envy fashion show, asking “Where are we headed with this friend group?” Indeed, it’s not that the season lacks conflict or compelling personal stories; rather, it’s challenging to accept the authenticity of the situations presented. Everything seems overly contrived, as if these women dislike each other so intensely they’re desperately searching for reasons to argue.

Dolores has also noticed the tension among the group members, as expressed in her confessional: “It seems everyone is on edge in this house, grasping for something to cling to.” Regarding Jackie Arnold, the many-times-great-granddaughter of Benedict Arnold, she made this comment during Melissa’s fashion show. Jackie joined Margaret, Danielle, and Rachel at their table, all adorned in midriff-exposing dresses borrowed from Envy. “Are you wearing Envy?” inquired Marge. Jackie responded negatively, and Marge then mentioned that Melissa had given each of them these dresses to wear.

Jackie angrily departs after feeling disappointed that Melissa didn’t provide her with a complimentary outfit for the event. When Jackie expresses her frustration to Dolores during a private conversation, she initially remarks that Jackie is too prone to drama and frequently finds offense in minor incidents. She also mentions that Melissa had informed her she would have offered Jackie a dress if she had contacted her, but Melissa didn’t want to put undue pressure on people to wear her clothes. While it’s understandable for Jackie to feel slighted, this reality show thrives on conflicts. Jackie has aligned herself with Team Teresa, so she can’t reasonably expect the perks of being friends with Melissa any longer. As Dolores pointed out, they seem to be searching for reasons to quarrel.

As someone who has attended numerous fashion shows throughout my career as a fashion journalist, I can tell you that Jennifer Aydin’s question during the Real Housewives of New Jersey episode about Melissa’s fashion show and the origin of the clothes being displayed was quite intriguing.

Jen harbors animosity towards Melissa, who didn’t extend an invitation to her for the show. Jen goes a step further, questioning why there were no male models in Melissa’s latest fashion presentation. A possible explanation is that during Melissa’s previous event, Envy may have been selling men’s clothing and now they aren’t. However, Jen insists that the reason for the absence of males lies in a rumor about Melissa dating a model from her last show. The issue here is that these women are constantly finding fault with those on the opposite side, making for an unkind and ungracious atmosphere on Bravo. Frankly, it has become a tiring and unpleasant spectacle.

The remainder of the episode doesn’t provide many developments in terms of individual storylines. Melissa’s mother introduces a new boyfriend, making for a charming addition. Dolores owns a canine companion named “Dog,” adding to the humor. The rift between Dolores and Marge is mended, as it was revealed that Marge was merely upset about being excluded from a dinner with Teresa and Luis following their last reunion. Marge admitted her resentment may stem from Paul favoring Team Teresa over her, which seems an excessive interpretation of events if Margaret’s perspective is to be believed.

When it comes to the most unusual and amusing interludes, nothing beats the scene where Danielle goes with her two children to shoot a Kidz Bop music video. I can only imagine that they showered Danielle with countless CDs for her minivan, pushing her hearing and patience to their limits as she listened to 12 third-graders singing the sanitized rendition of “Espresso” (“I’m working late… on my homework.”). The experience appeared delightful and the Cabrals kids seemed to enjoy it, but I’m not sure if we should be promoting Kidz Bop sales, right? Who knows, maybe Danielle’s daughter will release a lengthy dance remix of “1-877-Kars-4-Kidz” next.

Fortunately, the video production wrapped up sooner than expected, enabling Danielle and Nate to arrive at Teresa’s live podcast recording in time. Noteworthy attendees included Dorinda Medley, appropriately titled “Duchess of Bluestone Manor” instead of just “Teresa’s friend.” Let’s give some recognition to the legendary Housewife and perpetual meme machine that is Dorinda Medley. As for Danielle’s companions, let’s label them accurately in the chyrons as “Tiffany, Danielle’s friend,” and “Kayla, Danielle’s other friend.” When Dorinda, a significant guest, receives more airtime than those officially on the show, it’s clear that something is amiss.

The taping was progressing smoothly until Danielle and Jen Aydin encountered each other backstage for the first time since their infamous altercation in Paramus. When Teresa mentioned that the event was being held in a former church, Danielle bluntly remarked, “I’m amazed it hasn’t gone up in flames with you inside.” Her casual delivery of the comment left me in stitches. She didn’t raise her voice or demand the spotlight; she simply tossed out the quip for all to hear.

Teresa expresses her intention to resolve the conflict between Jen and Danielle, but Jen interprets this as Teresa abandoning her during the dispute since she still believes she was not the instigator (although she was). In my opinion, Teresa’s actions are simply an attempt to protect herself or maintain her innocence by refusing to take sides. Jen expresses her belief that they will never be able to reconcile, and once more, Dolores steps in on Jupiter’s behalf, reminding everyone that it’s Teresa’s turn to go back onstage for a Q&A session, which is about to begin shortly.

Danielle makes a final insult as she leaves: “By the way, you don’t look so good,” she tells Jen. I find this inappropriate but can’t help being amused. Among Real Housewives, it’s customary to exchange compliments about each other’s appearances at gatherings. Even archenemies Jen and Margaret have done so at the Envy fashion show. It’s the one thing that can temporarily thaw their frosty relationships. Danielle shatters this fragile truce with her harsh remark. Their animosity will never fade, as Jen doesn’t look good, and we all acknowledge it. Bravo, Danielle! You deserve another season and the spotlight as the Jersey Housewife. (Isn’t that what they feature in the New Jersey opening scene?)

After Danielle leaves, Dolores and Jen get into an heated argument, their voices drowning each other’s words making it unclear as to why they are both upset. This incident brings us back to our initial query: What’s going on with this friend group? Where will this hostility and competition lead us? I have a feeling it won’t end well, making for intriguing television. However, this isn’t the destruction I had anticipated. Frankly, I’m relieved we only have a few episodes left in the season.

2024-07-22 18:01

The Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: Green With Envy

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