Just like Will Smith’s lyrics in “Welcome to Miami,” the city seems perfect for him, and so does this particular TV show. It’s not always serious or dull, and it keeps you guessing about your feelings towards the cast members. Unlike Miami, some shows can be too intense, boring, or confusing, with you constantly switching between liking and disliking the characters. But Miami is just right – it’s warm, sunny, and full of excitement, even if there are occasional squabbles among its residents. This show has a special place in his heart because, unlike real life in Miami, no one needs to call the police. He absolutely adores this series!
In this jumbo-sized episode, we dive right into the thick of things. This season is off to a contentious start, with everyone arguing. The arguments are so substantial that Lisa hosts a birthday bash for her boyfriend, Jody, and they’re downing tequila from a massive bone to give it a marrow flavor. The arguments are so substantial, there’s even a neon sign on the photo wall that reads, “The Meat Drove Me To It.” I must admit, with all this beef and the pink polka-dotted outfit, one might mistake this for a Gay Pride event sponsored by Burger King and hosted by Kiki Barth.
Let’s delve into each aspect of the situation one by one, starting with the most significant event: the divorce between Alexia and Todd. The narrative unfolds in a disjointed manner as the show begins unconventionally, capturing events early due to the dramatic tension it presents. Unlike many Bravo shows today, production began filming ahead of time because they couldn’t afford to miss this drama.
On a Friday evening, Alexia and Todd enjoyed an extraordinary dinner together, followed by an intimate moment. However, the next morning, Todd abruptly evicted Alexia from their home and moved himself and his daughter into an apartment he had rented secretly a month earlier. The twist: He carried out this act in the presence of Alexia’s son Frankie, as if he didn’t matter at all. Frankie, who has special needs, was seemingly overlooked. That’s quite heartless.
In two days, Alexia found herself sobbing over the phone to her friend Teresa Giudice, who’s well-versed in less-than-ideal men. It was quite a sight, watching these two connect, even through a call. It felt like catching a glimpse of Miley Stewart and Hannah Montana together because they were essentially one person wearing different wigs. Later, Alexia shared her tears with the gathered ladies, expressing that they had no idea this turn of events was imminent.
Four months prior to filming commencing, Alexia and Todd found themselves reunited, despite their finalized divorce. If you’ve been tracking this tale with us at The Real Housewives Institute, you’re aware that they were spotted passionately kissing on a beach only a few months back. Even the fellow housewives are frustrated by Alexia’s oscillation with Todd, as Marysol remarked, “What is suitable for the hole is not suitable for the soul.” I strongly suggest you print this quote, turn it into merchandise like pillows, T-shirts, phone accessories, greeting cards, and dating app ads. I know at least 3 dozen people who need these items right away. Honestly, I foresee difficulties in following this storyline throughout the entire season. Frankly, I suspect the divorce might not be genuine. Although I rarely accuse any storylines on these shows of being fabricated, something about this situation seems inconsistent.
My hypothesis revolves around a statement Alexia made to Teresa: “He said I would be happy he did this,” she said. While purely speculative, I suspect that Todd may have been facing some financial difficulties, as Adriana hinted at last season. However, it’s important to note that I don’t have any insider knowledge.
Todd and Alexia divorced without her knowing or understanding the reasons behind it. The sincerity of her tears and disappointment when speaking with the women seemed genuine to me, given that many Housewives have struggled to convincingly fake emotions. After Todd explained his intention was to protect Alexia from potential financial harm, they decided to reconcile and continue their relationship. Yet, they formalized their divorce to ensure Alexia’s financial security.
Whether this scenario is accurate or not remains uncertain; I’m merely offering my interpretation. If it turns out to be the case and we have to endure an entire season of this drama, it could potentially become tiresome.
Fortunately, we have other matters to discuss, so let’s focus on Julia and Guerdy for now. Julia has taken in two young brothers, while Guerdy, having undergone six surgeries, four rounds of chemotherapy, and twenty rounds of radiation to treat her breast cancer, is now cancer-free. One would expect both women to be thriving with joy, but surprisingly, Julia is angry over Guerdy not announcing the adoption on their group Zoom call. Guerdy explains that Julia was late and she had an appointment, and when Guerdy followed up with Julia, she was dismissed. This petty argument seems destined to escalate unnecessarily, which is typical of Miami’s drama-filled dynamics, making it intriguing. It’s worth noting that in the absence of Dr. Nicole this season, Julia appears to be transitioning from the triangle of Nicole, Guerdy, and Adriana, into the dynamic of Alexia and Marysol as the third wheel.
At Lisa’s party for Lenny, an unexpected turn occurred when Julia and Martina snubbed the hostess, and later, Guerdy expressed her isolation to Martina on the couch. Alone with Adriana and Amaury, Guerdy found herself next to them, appearing as if they were attempting a bizarre Human Centipede-like imitation, but with the body parts mismatched.
Indeed, Adriana is quite smitten with her new companion, Amaury, who is both French and a Marquis. To put it simply, she can’t seem to keep her distance from him. If I had someone as handsome as Amaury, I might find myself getting overly affectionate on Lisa’s couch too. It’s great for Adriana, and Bravo TV is benefiting as well. After a Countess and a Princess, they now have a Marquis in their lineup. Soon, they may just have the full royal deck.
The most formidable feud, nevertheless, is between Lisa and Larsa, two seemingly distinct individuals who share an uncanny resemblance in character traits. To be frank, they both exhibit self-centeredness, narcissism, and a lack of understanding, constantly accusing each other of poor friendship, misinterpreting one another’s points, and leveling false accusations against the other. Indeed, it is baffling to fathom what these two discuss when they socialize. One might speculate that they simply take turns feigning interest as the other bores on about herself. The situation remains perplexing.
The conflict revolves around Marcus Jordan, whom Larsa claims she has ended things with permanently. It seems that Lisa and Jody were out for a drink, and Marcus arrived accompanied by “all of Jody’s friends.” Lisa reportedly acknowledged Marcus but declined to join them for dinner due to allegiance towards Larsa, while Jody went ahead. Later, Jody and Marcus posted a picture of themselves together on social media, which upset Larsa. Notably, Larsa feels that Lisa isn’t standing by her side in this situation.
As a movie buff, I’m finding myself stuck between two perspectives in this drama. Lisa is caught in a dilemma; with Larsa and Marcus’s on-again, off-again relationship, she didn’t want to cut ties due to the potential reunion, fearing she would appear foolish to her best friend’s boyfriend. On the other hand, Larsa claims that if I (and by extension Jody) were aware of Marcus’s hurtful words and threatening texts, we’d both avoid him. Lisa admits not knowing about these issues, but Larsa argues that she would have if only I ever bothered to answer my phone.
It seems like they both hold some valid points, yet they both falter in their logic. The essence of friendship appears to elude them, as shown by their self-centered actions towards each other. Sadly, it’s evident that they’re not the paragons of good behavior that Miami so richly deserves.
At the gathering, they engage in a heated argument. Larsa claims she’s always stood by Lisa during her divorce from Lenny, and expects the same support now. However, Lisa argues that their circumstances were not alike as she was burdened with two young children, while Larsa chose to leave her first husband. When Larsa talks about her latest split, she means the most recent one, not the previous one. Larsa then accuses Lisa of inviting other women into the hot tub with Lenny during their marriage, which allegedly led to the divorce. Lisa retorts by stating that Larsa’s personal life, particularly her OnlyFans content, is public knowledge, and she doesn’t condemn her for it. Their conversation oscillates back and forth like a tennis match, with neither gaining an advantage. The spectators seem to be the only ones benefiting from this endless exchange. Essentially, they are locked in an eternal game of deuce, with no clear winner except the onlookers.
The situation escalates when Lisa implies that Larsa’s current breakup with Marcus is not genuine, referring back to their first split. However, Larsa misunderstands Lisa’s words, thinking she’s implying her current breakup is fake, overlooking that Lisa was only talking about the initial one. In a heated moment, Larsa calls Lisa a “fake bitch,” prompting Lisa to ask her to leave. After a quick attempt by Kiki to clarify the misunderstanding in the bathroom, Larsa returns and labels Lisa as “stupid,” causing Lisa to ask her to leave once more. This argument could have been quickly resolved, but as Marysol suggests, kicking Larsa out only serves to fuel future arguments for several episodes to come.
Underneath the balmy Miami night sky, I stood outside, my eyes fixated on the luxury towers that seemed to blur together as I waited for my Uber Black. The empty, expansive road stretched out before me, bathed in a surreal glow from the streetlights that hinted at a digital simulation of tropical desolation. A longing tugged at my heart as I glanced back at Lisa’s apartment, still pulsating with life and the lingering scent of the party and the grilled beef. I yearned for harmony between me and Lisa, between me and my ex, for the comforting warmth of friendships and relationships in this tropical paradise. I longed for Miami – a place where the sun-kissed skies seemed to hold the promise of healing and reunion. As my shoes scraped against the curb, and a sleek black SUV idled before me, I couldn’t help but feel that maybe, just maybe, tonight would be the start of what I was yearning for.
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2025-06-12 06:54