As a seasoned TV enthusiast with a penchant for reality shows and a soft spot for romantic dramas, I find myself torn between my love for a good love story and my discomfort with the earnestness that often pervades these series. The Bachelor has always been an intriguing spectacle, but this season, it’s more about the contestants than the romance.
Frankly, I tend to stop watching Bachelor seasons at this stage. The amusing parts seem to be finished, and it mostly consists of individuals being sincere, which makes me uneasy since reality TV is about camaraderie and drama, not earnestness. Don’t get me wrong, I want Joan to find love, but I’m starting to think it will be with Chock. However, Chock isn’t particularly appealing. He might be better than Guy, another Bachelor contestant who has a restraining order against him, but I can’t support someone who is only “better” than someone with a restraining order. Yet, she might surprise me and choose Pascal instead. That would be quite extraordinary. I steer clear of spoilers intentionally so my predictions can either sound brilliant or way off the mark. Let’s pretend we live in a world where no one knows the outcome, then my guesses will either be spot on or wildly incorrect.
Regarding Pascal, he seems to be wearing simple white briefs. To put it mildly, it’s quite noticeable. Perhaps we should consider a more formal undergarment choice for the nationwide broadcast. Anyway, I don’t think Pascal will take my advice; he has laundry that he doesn’t seem inclined to do instead.
Joan has a quick chat with Trista Sutter at a lively L.A. coffee shop, which seems oddly cheerful for the current season. The atmosphere is filled with men in subdued tones. Like other alumni of the Bachelor series offering guidance, Trista advises Joan to open up more emotionally. However, Joan appears reluctant as they’re nearing the end of the show, and she finds herself on one-on-one dates with individuals she doesn’t feel a strong connection towards.
The first date card goes to Keith. Keith freaked out last week about not being in the moment with her and not being himself, so he determines to be in the moment on this date. It’s a classic helicopter date, and they fly to a vineyard. They’re greeted by married hippies. Tell me the woman hippie doesn’t remind you of Catherine Keener in Get Out. Despite this, Joan and Keith drink the wine, and then they go off and Keith shares about his ex-wife’s struggles with addiction. I was very confused at first about why Keith didn’t get a rose on this date because I missed where they said no roses were being handed out on dates this week. Hometowns means no immunity cards! Keith should be worried, because he and Joan have zero chemistry.
In simpler terms, Jonathan, Jordan, Guy, and Chock are participating in a group date that involves bowling. Bowling seems like a fun social activity, but it can be awkward because you have to face the people you’re with each time you bowl, which might lead to embarrassing moments if your skills aren’t great. In this case, these older men are probably proud of their bowling abilities and have to perform in front of each other, the woman they’re interested in, the camera crew, and a national audience. Essentially, what I’m trying to convey is that while it may appear as a fun activity, this date is actually quite stressful due to the high stakes involved. The tension among the men is palpable, with Chock displaying territorial behavior towards Joan, which irritates the other participants. This aggressive attitude reminds me of the villains on regular Bachelor seasons. However, it’s possible to spend time with Joan and make a good impression without being rude. Is this the norm in Wichita, sir?
Mark is kept for the final one-on-one meeting, which is beneficial as it seems the producers have planned this all along. My hypothesis is that Joan wasn’t initially attracted to him. However, he could still be a strong contender for the role of Golden Bachelor, despite his awkwardness and inappropriate comments about women. He is attractive and tall, which are essential qualities. Thus, the producers likely decided to delay his date until the end, cut him later, and keep him fresh in viewers’ minds for the upcoming season.
The timing is good. They embark on a boat journey. Joan discusses Mark’s numerous outstanding traits and reasons to continue watching him, expressing this in a speech reminiscent of a leading man. He shares his sentiments about the process boosting his self-assurance, envisioning his life thriving over the next five years. He also mentions his late wife, who battled stage-four breast cancer, prompting Joan to display an empathetic expression. However, Joan, your emotional reactions are not among your strengths as I perceive it.
At the grand estate, Mark felt the date went splendidly, only for that impression to crumble when Joan appeared and pulled him aside. They settled on a bench, yet an overpowering light illuminated Joan’s face, making Mark’s seem just fine. One would think someone would have set up a screen or something? Indeed, she’s the shining STAR of the evening. Thus, with dread gnawing at him, Mark listened as she delivered disappointing news, essentially stating that there was an emptiness in their connection and bid him farewell. He responded graciously, which was commendable because past rejected men on this series had acted abhorrently. In fact, he concluded his time here made him a better individual, man, and father. He bade goodbye to his peers residing in the house, and they wept. Pascal expressed Mark as his dearest friend, an endearingly sweet sentiment.
Here we go, it’s time for the rose ceremony. I must admit, my prediction about Guy and Pascal leaving was way off the mark. Keith shares with the camera that just because you feel a connection with Joan, doesn’t necessarily mean that she feels the same about you. A valuable lesson for all men. In the end, Pascal, Chock, Guy, and Jordan receive roses. Unfortunately, Jonathan and Keith are eliminated! Joan escorts Jonathan out and offers him some kind words. As he leaves in a car, Jonathan ponders if his journey is just getting started. Could Jonathan be the next Bachelor in Gold? Or perhaps Mark! But let’s be honest, we all know it should be Charles.
Golden Bachelorette Scoring
Each week, following the “Beach Games” scoring system by Michael Scott, I’ll be awarding ten points, a golden sticker, and a ‘thumbs up’. One unlucky individual may also find themselves dunked in a sea of chocolate!
• 10 Points: To Pascal for being the only person to not care about bowling.
• Gold Star: To Mark for being really wonderful when he was dumped.
• Thumbs-Up: To the guys who cried when Mark said he was leaving.
• Pushed into a Chocolate River: Pascal’s choice of underpants.
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2024-10-17 05:54