Senator Lummis’ Bitcoin Bonanza: A $1,000,000,000 Gamble! 🚀💰

“I am positively bursting with pride to reintroduce this monumental piece of legislation,” declared Senator Lummis on March 11, her voice dripping with the kind of enthusiasm usually reserved for discovering a golden ticket. “It’s all about codifying President Trump’s audacious vision to create the United States Strategic Bitcoin Reserve. Because, let’s face it, nothing says ‘economic foundation’ like a digital currency that could vanish faster than a chocolate bar in a room full of children.”

The Bitcoin Act, or as it’s officially known, the “Boosting Innovation, Technology, and Competitiveness through Optimized Investment Nationwide Act” (BITCOIN for short, because who doesn’t love a good acronym?), was first proposed in July 2024. But, like a bad penny, it needed to be reintroduced due to the new legislative term. Because, apparently, even laws need a second chance.

The bill has gathered a motley crew of Republican co-sponsors, including Senators Jim Justice, Tommy Tuberville, Roger Marshall, Marsha Blackburn, and Bernie Moreno. It’s like the Avengers, but with more suits and less spandex.

Proud to re-introduce the BITCOIN Act. Let’s secure America’s financial future.

— Senator Cynthia Lummis (@SenLummis) March 11, 2025

Establishing a Nationwide Strategic Bitcoin Reserve

The Act’s key provisions include creating a network of secure Bitcoin vaults operated by the US Treasury Department. Because, you know, nothing says “security” like a digital currency stored in a virtual vault. The plan also involves buying 1 million BTC, which is roughly 5% of the total supply. That’s right, folks, the government is going on a Bitcoin shopping spree!

The Bitcoin Purchase Program authorizes the acquisition of 200,000 BTC annually for five years, with a minimum 20-year holding period. Because, apparently, patience is a virtue, especially when it comes to volatile digital currencies.

“Bitcoin is not just a technological opportunity, but a national imperative for America’s continued financial leadership in the 21st century,” said Lummis, with the kind of conviction usually reserved for people who believe in unicorns.

Jim Justice called it a “common sense bill,” adding:

“There is plenty more to learn for me when it comes to Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies, but as a businessman I know that this effort just makes sense.”

Meanwhile, Tommy Tuberville said, “There’s no reason why we shouldn’t use Bitcoin to pay down our national debt.” Because, you know, nothing says “fiscal responsibility” like using a digital currency to pay off trillions of dollars in debt.

“Decades of out-of-control spending has led to a $36 trillion national debt, and developing a Strategic Bitcoin Reserve is a critical step to improving our nation’s balance sheet,” said Bernie Moreno, with the kind of optimism usually reserved for people who think they can win the lottery.

The bill also aims to reduce Federal Reserve discretionary surplus funds from $6.8 billion to $2.4 billion and redirect $6 billion of Federal Reserve remittances to the Treasury for the next four years. Because, you know, nothing says “financial prudence” like shuffling money around like a game of musical chairs.

Say it with me: this is the year for bitcoin and digital assets.

— Senator Cynthia Lummis (@SenLummis) March 11, 2025

State SBR Update

Currently, 19 US states have strategic Bitcoin reserve legislation pending, 2 have bills in the final stages of approval, and 5 states have rejected proposals to allow their treasuries to invest in BTC, according to the Bitcoin Reserve Monitor. Because, you know, nothing says “unity” like a patchwork of conflicting laws.

On March 6, President Trump signed an Executive Order to establish a strategic Bitcoin reserve using BTC already seized by the government. Because, you know, nothing says “law and order” like confiscating digital currency.

The asset has made a minor recovery today, gaining 4.6% to reclaim the $83,000 price level during early trading in Asia on Wednesday morning. It has corrected by almost 30% from all-time highs. Because, you know, nothing says “stability” like a 30% correction.

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2025-03-12 11:43