Rogue Ethereum Blockchain Hookups You Won’t Believe Exist 🤑

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What to know:

  • Orderly’s merry band of market makers (think crypto musketeers) includes Wintermute, Selini, and Riverside, as per the omniscient press release.
  • Monad’s testnet is launching Wednesday—expect airdrops galore and possibly the blockchain equivalent of winning a golden ticket. 🚀

Once upon a blockchain, Monad, a sprightly Ethereum Virtual Machine (EVM) layer-1 platform, decided to throw itself into the arms of Orderly Network, a decentralized exchange (DEX) built on the Near blockchain. It’s like two eccentric wizards with slightly oversized hats casting a joint spell to summon the mythical beast of “DeFi Summer 2.0” (release date TBD). 🧙‍♂️🧙‍♀️

This Wednesday, traders can rush to Monad’s testnet—think of it as a turbo-charged playground for code geeks that also dangles the glittery promise of airdrops. (Pro tip: keep your nets ready for free stuff.) Orderly’s formidable lineup of market makers brings to mind a slightly disorganized Avengers squad, including Wintermute, Selini, and Riverside, all united under the vague auspices of ‘press release approval.’

Meanwhile, the crypto world—which somehow manages to feel like the Wild West crossed with a midlife crisis—hopes for a new surge of DeFi activity. Why? Possibly because President Donald Trump and “crypto regulatory tailwinds” have been mentioned in the same sentence without immediate laughter ensuing. Throw in nostalgic visions of the first DeFi summer (2020), complete with Federal Reserve rate cuts, and you’ve got the oddest summer sequel pitch since Sharknado. 🦈🌪️

Orderly already offers a shared order book across blockchains like Arbitrum, Optimism, Polygon, Base, Mantle, and Near, proving that nothing screams “decentralized” like trying to be on every blockchain all at once. “Orderly is an omni-chain trading infrastructure aiming to fix fragmented liquidity,” said Chief Optimism Officer—oops, sorry, COO—Arjun Arora. Arora also hinted that DeFi’s total locked value (TVL) might as well be playing a blockchain version of the shell game. 🐚

In April 2024, Monad Labs casually passed the hat around and raised a cool $225 million in funding, led by Paradigm. Here’s hoping they spend some of it on a nice crypto-powered coffee machine. ☕

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2025-02-19 18:32