In an exquisite stroke of understatement, Durov assures us that, under the omnipresent gaze of the European Union Digital Services Act, Telegram might—just might—offer up the IP addresses and phone numbers of criminal suspects, provided they have been convicted of some heinous crime, of course. This brave proclamation comes on the heels of France’s ever-so-lovely dance with anti-encryption legislation.
Telegram’s Durov Gives the French a Lesson in Privacy: ‘We’re Not the Government’s Data Fetching Service’ 💼🔒
Telegram, that trusty haven for cryptocurrency enthusiasts and privacy zealots alike, has once again found itself at the heart of a media storm. Why? Well, it seems the European authorities have been practicing their favorite hobby—undermining encryption. Never one to shy away from a good confrontation, Pavel Durov, Telegram’s founder, has used his soapbox to unleash a tirade against France’s ever-so-progressive stance on encryption.
To set the stage, Durov reminded everyone that the French Senate had recently passed a law banning encryption, but—hold onto your croissants—the National Assembly, ever so reasonable, decided to slam on the brakes. What does this mean for us mere mortals? Well, should this law find its way onto the books, it would require messaging apps in France to install a backdoor, giving authorities the right to read our messages. Delightful, isn’t it?
Durov was quick to point out that, if such a backdoor were introduced, it would be an open invitation for anyone with a computer and a dubious moral compass to slip through it. The police might get in, but so would a delightful assortment of hackers, foreign spies, and anyone else looking for a little more than just your average Sunday gossip. As he so eloquently put it:
“It’s technically impossible to guarantee that only the police can access a backdoor. Once introduced, a backdoor can be exploited by other parties — from foreign agents to hackers.”
In Durov’s world, the law would have a rather comical consequence: criminal groups would simply pack up and leave, relocating to less scrutinized platforms. Naturally, this would render the whole endeavour utterly useless. But fret not, dear reader—Telegram’s commitment to privacy remains unwavering. While the EU’s heavy-handed regulations try to muddy the waters, Durov assures us that his beloved Telegram has never, not once, “disclosed a single byte” of private messages. Bravo! 🎩
But wait, there’s more! In an astounding display of transparency, Durov revealed that, in the event of a valid court order under the EU’s Digital Services Act, Telegram would only provide IP addresses and phone numbers—not messages. How kind of them!
Of course, no saga of privacy woes would be complete without a touch of personal drama. Durov, ever the reluctant hero, addressed rumors regarding his arrest in France. Some suggested that his capture was a masterstroke of compliance with EU privacy laws. Durov, ever the picture of dignity, clarified that it was actually the French police who, after his arrest, had been compelled to follow the law. Oh, how they grow up so fast! 🙄
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2025-04-22 12:58