Oh, wow, what a week. The markets? A bloodbath. Bitcoin below $80K? ETH down to $1,821? March 10 was like a day in crypto purgatory. And hey, remember the “Trump Bump”? Yeah, not bumping anymore. The new administration? They’re running around slapping tariffs on everything like they’re Oprah handing out cars. Recession fears? Clearly, the markets got the memo. Crypto didnât even get a pity hug.
But you know what? Progress keeps marching on đ„ (even if the markets arenât). BlackRock, the big kahuna, saw its BUIDL fund cross $1 billion. Yeah, *billion*. And tokenized treasuries? $4.2 billion. Not bad for some “digital whatnots,” huh? MoonPay decided to toss their hat into the stablecoin game. Why? Who knows, but they did it. Rippleâs busy winning licenses in the UAE like itâs collecting PokĂ©mon cards. OKX strutted into Europe with a license in hand. And Coinbase? Theyâre like that one diner that thought it was a good idea to stay open 24/7ânow planning futures trading at all hours. Sure, who even sleeps anymore? Weâve got crypto to trade! đđ€
Now, letâs talk regulation. The IRS âbroker ruleâ? Overturned. Defi operators are probably high-fiving somewhere. Meanwhile, the Senateâs tinkering with this âGENIUSâ stablecoin act, splitting regulation between state and federal governments. And they named it âGENIUSâ â sure, no ego there. The bill will likely move forward, so stay tuned. Or donât, itâs your time.
Oh, and guess whoâs making crypto headlines? Of course, the Trumps. World Liberty Financial pulled off a $590 million token sale (but, of course, *only* for the fancy âaccredited investorsâ). They’ve got Justin Sun on board, because why not? Also, a Trump family rep allegedly explored buying a stake in Binance.US. Thatâs not going to stir up any drama, right? đš
From Asia: Sam Reynolds is *deep* into the âGENIUSâ act, where it’s basically state vs. federal for stablecoin rules. Coinbase decided to pop back into India after two years of uh… a âlong coffee breakâ? Naturally, it sparked debates about Indiaâs crypto future. Fingers crossed they donât get kicked out again. đ€
Shaurya Malwa is apparently carrying the XRP team on his back with reports about Ripple and crypto market over-leveraging, where Hyperliquid lost $4 million. Four. Million. Dollars. Just… poof. Gone. Someone hit the leverage button a little *too* hard.
And then weâve got Eric Trump tweeting crypto nonsense that has short-term traders biting their nails. Omkar Godbole called it earlyâheâs like the Nostradamus of bitcoin signals. Also, Tom Carreras came in hot with a Bitdeer mining machine exposĂ©. You didnât think weâd forget about Singapore-based miners, did you? đȘ
So thatâs your week. Drowning in market drama, but hey, weâve got headlines for everyone. Maybe next week wonât have that dumpster-fire energy. Or maybe it will. Either way, weâll be here to type it all out for you. Oy vey. đ€·ââïž
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2025-03-14 20:08