MicroStrategy Cult Drops Half a Million Bitcoins Like It’s Hot 💸🚀

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  • Strategy’s hoarding a casual 538,200 BTC—because who doesn’t hoard the equivalent of a small country’s GDP?
  • Bitcoin’s plunging? Strategy’s still grinning like a cat with cream, betting big on Bitcoin and AI.

Once upon a time, there was a company called MicroStrategy. Now it’s just “Strategy” because why stick to one identity when you can have a glow-up? They just splurged on 6,556 more bitcoins. Dropping $555.8 million like it’s pocket change, they snagged each coin at a princely average of $84,785. Because nothing says “faith” like dropping serious cash on digital magic beans priced to make your wallet sweat.

Strategy’s 2025 Bitcoin Binge: 91,800 BTC and Counting

As of April 20, 2025, Strategy’s hoard is a cool 538,200 bitcoins. If you’re wondering about the piggy bank’s weight, it’s a staggering $36.47 billion worth. Their average buy-in? $67,766 per coin, which means they’re sitting on roughly $10 billion of “paper profits.” AKA, the kind of money that looks good on spreadsheets but might cause heart palpitations at market dips.

February 2025 saw our dear MicroStrategy stage a dramatic identity crisis and rebrand to “Strategy.” The plan? Shift gears from boring business intelligence to riding the wild rollercoaster of Bitcoin and AI. It’s like swapping spreadsheets for shiny crypto toys and robot brains—ambitious, slightly bonkers, and oh-so-2025.

Strategy didn’t just talk the talk. They bought 22,048 bitcoins in late March (a wallet-numbing $1.92 billion) in what’s arguably their biggest crypto shopping spree to date. But then they hit the brakes—for about a week—when Bitcoin’s price slipped under $87,000. Because even the most hardcore hodlers need a tiny coffee break.

In total, 2025 has seen them gobble up 91,800 bitcoins, which constitutes about 17% of their Everest-sized stash. Clearly, Strategy’s not here for a casual fling—they’re dating Bitcoin for life.

Strategy’s Still Bullish While Bitcoin Takes a Price Yoga Class

Bitcoin’s price gap is narrowing faster than your patience in a Zoom meeting. Although dropping prices could mean future buys are cheaper, possibly squeezing profit margins, Strategy’s tightening its grip, eyes glued on the Bitcoin crystal ball.

Michael Saylor, the company’s fearless ringmaster and executive chairman, keeps shouting from the rooftops about Bitcoin’s bright future. He’s even lobbying for Uncle Sam to play ball by making official rules on digital assets and pouring some government love into Bitcoin investment. Dream big or go home, right?

According to Saylor, such moves would crown the U.S. as the global crypto godfather, turbocharge the economy, and maybe even slice the national debt. Wallets and debt, living in harmony—what a neat trick.

So yeah, Strategy isn’t just hoarding coins, slapping on a new name, and chatting about AI for kicks. They’re making it obvious: they believe Bitcoin and AI are the future, and they’re staking their fortress accordingly. With over half a million bitcoins tucked away, they’re the heavyweight champs of the corporate Bitcoin stash—and we’re all just watching to see what wild moves they pull next.

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2025-04-21 22:22