In a world where Bitcoin’s volatility rivals a caffeinated squirrel on a trampoline, Kevin O’Leary, the self-proclaimed oracle of “Shark Tank,” graced Fox News with his sage wisdom. His message? Buckle up, buttercup, because Bitcoin is about to move faster than a politician’s promise.
Lara Trump, the prodigal daughter-in-law of the Trump dynasty, recently returned to Fox News after a brief hiatus. She sat down with O’Leary at Pubkey, a New York City crypto bar that smells faintly of desperation and stale beer. Here are the five money quotes from their tête-à-tête:
1. The ‘Crypto Cowboy’ Era Is Over 🤠
“We’re coming out of the cowboy era of cryptocurrency,” O’Leary declared, as if he were announcing the end of a particularly rowdy rodeo. “Now all the crypto cowboys are in jail or out of business.”
He’s referring to a motley crew of crypto entrepreneurs who ran afoul of the law, including Alex Mashinsky of Celsius, Sam Bankman-Fried of FTX, and Changpeng Zhao of Binance. Mashinsky could spend 30 years in prison, Bankman-Fried is serving 25, and Zhao just finished a four-month stint. O’Leary predicts that under a Trump administration, the crypto industry will become the economy’s 12th sector.
2. Crypto Is The Economy’s New ‘12th Sector’ 📈
“We have 11 sectors. I believe crypto will be the 12th,” O’Leary said, as if he were unveiling a new flavor of ice cream. “There’s a new tone that Trump is putting forward. They’re going to provide regulations.”
The 11 market sectors, according to the Global Industry Classification Standard, include IT, Financials, Health care, and more. O’Leary believes crypto has the potential to disrupt and revolutionize all these segments.
3. Trump Bitcoin Policies Are Hastening Adoption 🇺🇸
“This will be the first administration that’s going to say this sector belongs in America,” O’Leary proclaimed, as if he were planting a flag on the moon. “The development should be here. The technology should be mastered here. We should lead the world in it.”
O’Leary has long anticipated the mainstreaming of Bitcoin technology and cryptocurrency platforms. With the Trump government stepping in to embrace Bitcoin, the US has finally gotten the regulatory update O’Leary was waiting for.
4. Holding Bitcoin Yourself Is Risky For Newbies 🚨
“To make it safe, go to an accredited exchange like Coinbase,” O’Leary advised, as if he were teaching a toddler how to cross the street. “If you try and do this on your own in a decentralized wallet, someone will hack you, most likely because you don’t know what you’re doing.”
Intermediate and advanced crypto investors take extra steps to secure their crypto wallets and computer networks, but for newbies, O’Leary recommends sticking with a regulated exchange.
5. ‘Start Small’ And Learn Before Making Big Moves 🐣
“Start small,” O’Leary said, as if he were handing out life advice at a kindergarten graduation. “Buy a third of a Bitcoin. Treat it as an investment long term. It’s a new asset form. Think about it as digital gold.”
As a parting shot, O’Leary admonished, “It’s learning in small increments and not risking too much.”
So there you have it, folks. Kevin O’Leary’s crypto wisdom, served with a side of sarcasm and a dash of humor. Whether you’re a seasoned investor or a crypto newbie, remember: start small, stay safe, and don’t get too attached to your digital gold. 🚀💎
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2025-03-23 15:49