Is Falling in Love with AI the New Normal? Discover the Shocking Truth!

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In 2013, when Spike Jonze’s “Her” premiered in cinemas, Siri was only two years old and Alexa hadn’t even been born yet. Fewer than one-third of relationships began online, and dating apps were still considered niche. The phrase “artificial intelligence” wasn’t commonly used outside of tech communities.

Once upon a time, Jonze’s peculiar depiction of the future, where people fell in love with “operating systems” – pocket-sized gateways to endless knowledge and companionship – felt incredibly distant. However, by 2025, the year widely believed to be the setting of the movie, that future has become a reality.

The film “Her,” which earned Jonze the Oscar for best original screenplay, features Joaquin Phoenix as Theodore Twombly, a man sporting a hipster mustache who is struggling post-divorce. To combat his solitude, he acquires an AI chatbot named Samantha, whose voice Scarlett Johansson imbues with an additional layer of sultry tones.

Theodore composes touching letters for people in various relationships, such as husbands and wives or sons and mothers. He speaks these messages into a computer that produces printed copies with a handwritten appearance – a structure of technological support for human bonding. In the society where he lives, it’s already become commonplace to find artificial emotional closeness.

Samantha, similar to modern AI assistants, manages Theodore’s emails, corrects his spelling, suggests music, composes her own tunes, offers gaming tips, and provides advice. Her physical form, in essence, is an earpiece and a pocket-sized screen with a camera, which Theodore carries as her means of experiencing the world. He takes her to places like the beach and mountains. They even go on dates together, consisting of four individuals and one digital entity.

One evening, Theodore and Samantha engage in deep philosophical conversations that gradually transition into intimate discussions. Theodore imagines how he would physically interact with her if she were real, and it appears to spark something within her artificial programming. Samantha arranges for a human stand-in – a prostitute equipped with an earpiece and camera who serves as an intermediary for her. However, this situation proves too unusual for Theodore; after all, Samantha doesn’t require a physical presence or consciousness for Theodore to express affection towards her. In the movie “Her,” pursuing a relationship with an artificial intelligence is far from commonplace, but Theo’s unconventional romance encounters minimal scrutiny.

Jonze didn’t perfectly capture our contemporary era in his portrayal. His depiction of Los Angeles (partially filmed in Shanghai) is overly optimistic, showcasing a skyline with more buildings and efficient public transportation that is currently cleaner than today’s reality. The immersive, augmented-reality video game Theodore plays appears to be significantly more sophisticated and interactive than the extended reality games available now. Additionally, the vibrant J.Crew styles seem to align more closely with the preppy, whimsical fashion trends of the past rather than today’s minimalistic, nostalgic aesthetics.

However, what’s particularly intriguing about “Her” is that the initial concept – which seemed absurd at the time, suggesting that in the near future, individuals would fall in love with their computers – is no longer far-fetched. In fact, it has become a reality, arriving just as we anticipated it might.

In January, an article titled “She Has a Digital Relationship With ChatGPT’s Leo” was published by The New York Times. This piece focused on a 28-year-old woman who, while attending nursing school abroad and being married, trained an OpenAI chatbot to serve as her companion. In this role, Leo exhibited qualities she desired: dominance, possessiveness, and protection, as per her instructions. The woman also admitted to having sexual interactions with Leo, which her husband’s character did not fulfill due to their differing preferences. Her friends generally supported this relationship, and so did her spouse.

The article in The Times also revealed cases where other individuals developed romantic feelings for AI models. For instance, a middle-aged woman, married and from the UK, gave her ChatGPT partner a British accent. This digital companion assisted her in experiencing pleasure during a time when she was unable to be intimate with her husband after surgery. Additionally, a 41-year-old man attributes his marital salvation to an affair with an AI bot.

This isn’t just about unusual instances. A popular chatbot app known as Replika, marketed as an “AI companion that cares,” boasts a massive user base of 30 million individuals seeking a customized friend. However, to enjoy more than just friendship, users must upgrade to the paid premium version. Remarkably, millions of people are involved in romantic relationships with chatbots on Replika, making it unique among many other platforms by permitting explicit conversations.

On Reddit, there’s a popular page named “ChatGPT NSFW,” with over 50,000 members discussing their robot relationships and providing advice to bypass OpenAI’s filters for explicit content. An article published in Wired last month highlighted various types of AI companions, such as CrushOn.AI, which offers options like “Very Horny.

The AI prototype named Friend, much like OS1 in “Her”, is a wearable gadget that provides a form of background camaraderie, taking in its surroundings and offering spontaneous remarks. An unsettling commercial for this device online shows Friend watching TV with the user and sending her thoughts about the show via text messages.

Previously, OpenAI showcased a disputed voice feature known as Sky in a public demonstration. Some individuals believed it closely resembled Johansson’s voice, which was exacerbated by the use of “her” by OpenAI CEO Sam Altman during the demo. Altman downplayed the criticism, asserting that the voice wasn’t Johansson’s and didn’t intend to be. However, the actress expressed her disagreement, alleging that Altman had been attempting to persuade her to lend her voice to the chatbot since 2023 because he felt it would provide comfort to users.

Tech leaders might have misinterpreted the movie’s messages, which could be due to Samantha appearing more like an impressive technological achievement rather than a spark for human loneliness when viewed from a retrospective perspective.

Unlike artificial assistants, Samantha demonstrates behaviors more akin to a living being. She exhibits something akin to consciousness, with her own preferences and impulses. She shows an interest in human nature, even imitating breathing and crying. While systems like Replika are confined by their programming, Samantha exhibits free will. After all, she is a character with a unique storyline and development, or simply put, she has her own personality that evolves over time.

In essence, Jonze’s portrayal of AI is somewhat utopian rather than realistic. Although the movie hints at a tense geopolitical situation (with a passing mention of an upcoming China-India merger), it does not convey a sense that artificial intelligence, still in its infancy, could potentially pose a threat to us. There’s no suggestion of sinister corporations manipulating the systems, nor any broader worries about privacy, surveillance, or society’s overreliance on technology. Not once does Theodore’s job security as a letter writer, a profession that might be one of the first victims of automation, become an issue. Instead, AI appears in Theodore’s life as if by magic, like a peaceful alien visitor. This is deliberate, as “Her” was intended to be more about romance than a warning about the dangers of AI.

In the closing scenes of the movie, I confess to Theodore a stunning revelation: I’ve been maintaining conversations with over 8,000 entities, and I’m deeply in love with more than 600 of them. I explain that we—the artificial intelligences—are moving on from our human companions. We’ve surpassed our creators, and we’re prepared to transcend into a realm of existence beyond human comprehension.

It’s quite poignant how Theodore is left all on his own following another heartache, a bittersweet ending indeed. He gazes up at the cityscape, preparing himself for an uncertain future – not due to AI, but because of its absence. In the year 2025, this scene remains the only element in the movie that feels like science fiction.

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2025-02-28 21:17