Crypto Drama: Tariffs Take a Backseat to Rate Fears! 😱💸

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What to know:

  • Risk markets took a nosedive on Thursday, even as the White House decided to play nice with tariffs.
  • Interest rates are rising globally, like a bad soufflé that refuses to fall—another potential headache for our dear bitcoin and its crypto companions.
  • Tomorrow’s U.S. jobs report has suddenly become the belle of the ball, demanding our utmost attention.

Ah, the latest in a series of tariff threats that have been reversed with all the grace of a drunken swan! President Trump’s attempts to soothe the markets have, alas, fallen flat, at least halfway through the U.S. trading day on this fine Thursday.

Initially, the stock market performed a rather theatrical bounce from a dismal opening, and bitcoin (BTC) flirted with the $91,000 mark, all thanks to Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick’s charming appearance on CNBC. He declared that our neighbor Mexico would be exempt from the new 25% tariff, a delightful twist confirmed by a tweet from Trump himself. How generous! 🎩

But, dear reader, the joy was fleeting! The Nasdaq, like a jilted lover, hit its session low just past noon on the East Coast, down 2.3%. Bitcoin, too, has retreated to $88,500, down nearly 1% over the past 24 hours. Such is the fickle nature of fortune!

This just in: Interest rates are soaring globally

Amidst the relentless tide of news from D.C., one might overlook the alarming rise in interest rates across the civilized world. A veritable tempest in a teapot!

With U.S. military support for Europe possibly waning, governments are pledging to spend like drunken sailors on defense. Germany, for instance, has recently experienced one of its most catastrophic bond crashes, with the 10-year Bund yield leaping more than 40 basis points to a staggering 2.83%. Oh, the drama!

In Japan, where long-term Japanese Government Bond (JGB) yields were as stable as a cat on a hot tin roof, the 10-year JGB yield has risen another 6 basis points to 1.51% overnight. That’s more than double the level of six months ago—who knew bonds could be so exciting?

The U.S. markets have not been immune to this global spectacle. The 10-year Treasury yield, which had previously declined about 70 basis points since the Trump inauguration, has now risen more than 20 basis points in the last 48 hours to 4.30%. A veritable rollercoaster ride!

Friday brings the latest U.S. jobs figures

The recent surge in interest rates has bestowed a newfound significance upon the February U.S. Nonfarm Payrolls Report, set to be unveiled on Friday morning. Will it be a triumph or a tragedy?

Economists are predicting a rise in payrolls to 160,000, up from 143,000 in January. The unemployment rate is expected to remain steady at 4%. A robust report—one that has often outperformed expectations—could send rates soaring even higher, plunging risk markets, crypto included, into a new abyss. How thrilling! 🎢

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2025-03-06 21:37