China Tells US to Stop Shooting Itself in the Foot — Now!

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Chinese Gobbling Up U.S. Treasuries

Apparently, China is feeling more than a little annoyed with Uncle Sam at the moment. They’re demanding the US “immediately correct its wrongdoings,” because, you know, nothing says “good neighbour” quite like a good old-fashioned trade spat. 🤷‍♂️

It all started when the folks over at the Commerce Department decided to play hardball and warned everyone that using Huawei’s fancy Ascend chips without permission could land you in hot water—think substantial criminal and administrative penalties. Because nothing says “free enterprise” like threatening jail time over a microchip! 💾

But wait, it gets better. Chinese officials claim this new guidance “undermines” trade talks held recently in Geneva — yes, that nice Swiss city known for chocolate and diplomacy. Apparently, accusing China of “discriminatory” measures is all part of a robust international handshake, though the Chinese say that’s just code for “we’re not buying your tired old excuses.”

In their own words, the Chinese government declared, “The U.S. has been abusing export control measures, imposing stricter restrictions on Chinese chip products under unfounded accusations… China firmly opposes this… Trying to trip others won’t make oneself run faster.” Oof. Looks like someone’s been taking boxing lessons from the World Trade Organization! 🥊

Meanwhile, China has decided to sell off billions of dollars’ worth of US Treasuries—presumably to buy a nice small island or maybe just to mess with Uncle Sam’s economy. Between February and March, their holdings plummeted by a staggering $18.9 billion, which most other countries turned into a little extra spending money instead, boosting their UST holdings instead. Because nothing says “we mean business” like swapping American IOUs for slightly bigger IOUs from your neighbour in the UK. 🇬🇧

In fact, the UK has now overtaken China as the second-largest holder of US Treasuries — yes, the same UK that’s been politely pretending to be our ‘special friend’ all these years. And the Cayman Islands, with a population just shy of a small town, has become the fourth biggest creditor with a jaw-dropping $455 billion. Apparently, they’re buying USTs as if there’s no tomorrow — but the question is, how will they manage to buy both USTs and more American-made goodies? That’s a riddle wrapped in an enigma, served with a splash of sarcasm. 🤔

So, what’s next? Perhaps a global game of economic musical chairs, with countries scrambling to buy or sell just enough to keep Uncle Sam from falling flat on his face. Or, perhaps not. Either way, it’s safe to say that international trade isn’t getting any simpler — or less entertaining.

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2025-05-19 21:21