Bitcoin Jesus Begs Trump for Miracle: 109 Years in Prison? 😱

So, Roger Ver—yes, the guy they call “Bitcoin Jesus” 🙏—has decided to go full-on dramatic and plead for help from none other than Donald Trump. Because, of course, when you’re facing 109 years in prison, who else are you going to call? Ghostbusters? Nope. The man with the golden hair and a penchant for pardons. 🦸‍♂️

In a video posted on X (formerly Twitter, but let’s not get into that drama), Ver basically said, “Hey, Don, I’m about to be shipped off to the U.S. from Spain for, like, being a crypto activist or something. Help a guy out?”

The Plea

Ver, who apparently thinks he’s the Leonardo DiCaprio of Bitcoin (you know, the first to invest and all that), is now sweating bullets in Spain. He’s like, “I’m an American at heart, but the government is out to get me because I’m too cool for traditional finance.” 🕶️

He even compared his situation to Trump’s legal woes, which is… bold. Like, sure, Roger, you’re basically the crypto version of a former president now. Totally the same. 🙄

He ended the video with, “Please, Donald, help me win this lawsuit so I can come home and help you make America great again.” Because nothing says “Make America Great Again” like dodging a 109-year prison sentence, right? 🇺🇸

Oh, and did I mention he renounced his U.S. citizenship in 2014? Yeah, he’s now a citizen of Saint Kitts and Nevis, which sounds like a tropical vacation but is apparently just a tax dodge. 🏝️

Bitcoin Jesus’ Legal Troubles

So, the U.S. Department of Justice is like, “Hey, Roger, you owe us $48 million in taxes,” and he’s like, “Nah, bro, the rules weren’t clear back then.” Classic. 🤷‍♂️

He got arrested in Spain in May, but they let him out on bail, probably because they felt bad for the guy who’s been calling himself “Bitcoin Jesus” since 2011. 🕊️

Now, Trump, who’s suddenly all about crypto (because why not?), is being asked to step in and save the day. He did pardon Ross Ulbricht, so maybe there’s hope for Roger yet. Or maybe he’ll just tweet about it and call it a day. 🐦

Read More

2025-01-27 22:08