ETH Price Rockets 29%, But Nobody Cares—Is This Rally Just Another Tease?

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Key takeaways:

  • Ethereum jumped 22% on May 8. Nobody seems to care. Spot ETH ETFs and derivatives? About as exciting as a plain bagel.

  • President Trump flip-flopped on altcoins (shocking, I know), which magically “aligns” with Ethereum’s warm glow.

Ethereum (ETH) decided to show some life, bouncing up 29% between May 8 and May 9. Remember those good ol’ bear market vibes? Yeah, that supposedly ended at $1,385 on April 9. This move absolutely trampled $400 million worth of short sellers. Picture a stampede, but everyone’s in sweatpants.

And yet, after all this hoopla? Traders are as neutral as a guy ordering a salad with no dressing. Is this real momentum, or just warming up for another, “Hey, let’s try $2,000 and immediately panic” moment? Honestly, who knows.

The ETH futures premium hasn’t even cracked 5%. Five! That’s like tipping a waiter with Canadian pennies. Nobody’s lining up to take bullish bets. ETH is underperforming the altcoin market by 17% this year. There’s confidence for you—like a weatherman who always brings an umbrella.

Some hotshot analysts say, “Ooh, short squeeze incoming!”—while others stare at “the fundamentals” like they’re searching for meaning in a Seinfeld rerun.

Ethereum: Still The Boss Of Decentralization (But Who’s Watching?)

No matter how much ETH acts up with price swings, the network itself has gotten a facelift. Layer-2 upgrades, they’re saying! Very impressive. Supposedly puts Ethereum ahead in decentralization and security. TVL (total value locked) sits at $64 billion—meanwhile Solana, BNB, Tron, the whole gang, brought $22.3 billion to the potluck combined. So basically: Ethereum is hosting the party, but pizza delivery is running late.

Demand for spot ETH ETFs? Picture a movie premiere where someone forgot to invite the audience. Even after the best day in years, ETH spot ETFs in the US bled $16 million on May 8. I’ve seen more enthusiasm in a DMV waiting room.

Why the big yawn? Maybe it has something to do with Ethereum fees dropping 85% (don’t get too excited)—less activity, less demand, staking yields taking a hit, and the protocol burn mechanism is feeling about as effective as a screen door on a submarine.

But what do options traders think? Glad you asked—puts and calls are trading at the same price. It’s the “meh” Olympics. Not exactly thrilling for the bullish crowd, but hey, maybe ETH just wants a nap.

Maybe President Trump will save the day (words I never thought I’d say about Ethereum), since he apparently broke up with his altcoin lobbyist. One day he loves SOL, ADA, XRP—next day, “I was played!” Classic. Executive Orders, lobbyists, and strategic reserves flying around. You’d think it’s a reality show, but the ratings are still down.

At this point, rallies toward $2,700 aren’t out of the question—if, and this is a big if, the crowd wakes up and notices. Until then, enjoy the ride. Who knows, maybe by the time everyone tunes in, you’ll have already missed the commercial break.

This article is strictly Larry’s observations. For real investment advice, talk to someone with a briefcase. Or someone who actually likes roller coasters.

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2025-05-10 05:00