Steak ‘N Shake Throws Bitcoin at Your Burger – But Will Your Wallet Survive?

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If you’ve ever stood in line at Steak ‘N Shake, pondering whether to spend your last dollars on a double steakburger or a frothy milkshake, now you can escalate that existential crisis with the addition of cryptocurrency. As of May 16, Steak ‘N Shake will enthusiastically accept Bitcoin at its outlets nationwide, ensuring that not only your cholesterol, but also your blockchain, is engaged with every bite. 🥩🥤💸

This seismic shift in the fast-food cosmos was heralded recently by the chain’s announcement that all 100 million (give or take a galaxy or two) customers may pay for “handcrafted steakburgers and scientifically dubious milkshakes” in BTC. After dropping oh-so-subtle (read: “about as subtle as being hit with a frying pan”) hints since March, they’re actually doing it. Somewhere, a Bitcoin maximalist in Florida just fainted out of sheer joy—or maybe from too many fries.

“Steak n Shake accepting Bitcoin payments at all locations starting May 16, making the cryptocurrency available to our more than 100 million customers,” the official account declared, to thunderous applause from crypto bros and bemused silence from everyone else still trying to remember where they parked their car.

In a display of cryptic showmanship that would make even Zaphod Beeblebrox blush, Steak ‘N Shake ended with: “The movement is just beginning….” No word as yet on whether the movement refers to cryptocurrency, milkshake-induced gastrointestinal reactions, or both.

Rocketing into the future—or, at least, Florida—Steak ‘N Shake’s 393 restaurants (according to oracle-of-all-things, ScrapeHero) are girding themselves for the onslaught of Bitcoin-fueled customers. With 20% of branches strategically positioned in Florida (a state well-known for both its oranges and enthusiasm for speculative assets), it’s anyone’s guess whether retirees or blockchain enthusiasts will win the queueing contest.

In related news, Bitcoin just casually strolled past the $100,000 barrier, making thousands of investors momentarily feel like protagonists in their own sci-fi saga—at least until the price changes again. At last count, BTC was trading at $103,017, which is either a milestone or an elaborate punchline, depending on whom you ask.

Hinting at Bitcoin payment options

Steak ‘N Shake began teasing this move on March 8, placing humanity’s collective fate in the hands of a Twitter poll (always a recipe for interplanetary harmony). Even Jack Dorsey, distinguished beard and ex-Twitter CEO, contributed a pithy “yes” to the proceedings, which we can only assume was powered by great wisdom or a craving for onion rings.

Things escalated on March 13, when the official account posted an image of a spaceship hurtling across Mars, trailing the sweet scent of beef tallow and hauling a colossal Bitcoin logo. As every expert in astrobiology knows, financial markets flourish on the Red Planet.

Of course, Steak ‘N Shake is not alone in its quest. Chipotle started accepting crypto in 2022, and now approximately 3,000 of its locations are legally obliged to tolerate customers waving their phones and muttering about “digital wallets.” To further complicate the timeline, Subway flirted with Bitcoin payments back in 2013, but only in specific franchises and, presumably, only if you asked very, very nicely.

We may never know exactly what the future holds, but rest assured: your next burger fix may just be a private key away. 🚀🍔

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2025-05-09 11:01