Cyber Caper: North Korea’s Lazarus Outshines Musk’s Tesla in Bitcoin Stakes

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In the know:

  • The dastardly Lazarus Group, North Korea’s very own cybercabal, has more bitcoin than the almighty Tesla. 🚀
  • Last month, the cheeky chaps at Lazarus swiped $1.4 billion in ether from Bybit, and voilà, some of it is now shiny new bitcoin. 💰
  • Who knew Tesla’s crypto cache could be outshone by a bunch of keyboard cowboys from Pyongyang? 🌟

It appears, dear reader, that the Lazarus Group, a rather unsavory lot with links to North Korea, has outdone Elon Musk’s Tesla in the bitcoin department. Quelle surprise! 🎩

As of this moment, the crafty Lazarus crew boasts 13,441 BTC worth $1.14 billion, according to Arkham Intelligence. That’s a full 16% more than Tesla’s paltry 11,509 BTC. Take that, Mr. Musk! 😲

The Lazarus lads struck Bybit last month, making off with $1.4 billion in ether. Some of these ill-gotten gains have been cleverly converted into bitcoin, no doubt to fund their next dastardly deed. 🏦

Tesla, ever the patient investor, acquired its bitcoin stash four years ago and has been HODLing ever since, making it the world’s fourth-largest publicly listed company in terms of BTC holdings. But who’s counting? 🤔

In a twist of fate, President Donald Trump’s love for cryptocurrency has sparked a global BTC frenzy, yet here we are, with a North Korean hacker group leading the pack. How positively delightful! 🌍

Trump, ever the showman, has vowed to make the U.S. the “undisputed Bitcoin superpower and the crypto capital of the world.” One wonders if Tesla will now up its game to outshine these cyber scoundrels. 🇺🇸

And let’s not forget, the U.S. government holds a tidy sum of 198,109 BTC, worth over $16 billion, all seized in various enforcement actions. Trump calls it a strategic reserve; we call it a crypto cache. 🏦

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2025-03-21 09:27