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Ether, the cryptocurrency that’s like Bitcoin’s quirky younger sibling, decided to go on a 7% joyride in the past 24 hours. Why? Because apparently, everyone’s holding their breath for the Federal Open Market Committee (FOMC) meeting. Because nothing says “thrilling” like a bunch of people in suits deciding whether to raise interest rates or not. 🎢
Meanwhile, Dogecoin, the meme that somehow became a currency, tagged along with a 4% gain. Because of course it did. Pepe and Mog, two other Ethereum-based memecoins, also joined the party, rising over 5%. It’s like a digital circus where the clowns are also the ringmasters. 🤡
Bitcoin, the OG of cryptocurrencies, is chilling just under $84,000, trying to look cool while everyone nervously watches the $80,000 mark like it’s the last slice of pizza at a party. If it dips below that, well, let’s just say the crypto bros might start sweating more than usual. 🍕
Gold, the old-school safe haven, decided to flex by breaking above $3,000. Bitcoin, on the other hand, is acting more like a rebellious teenager, ignoring its “digital gold” label and instead behaving like a risk asset. Because why not? 🤷♂️
Ethereum’s next big update, Pectra, is in the works, promising to make things faster, better, and shinier. But let’s be real, it’s still in testing, and the testnets are having more issues than a middle school dance. Holesky, Sepolia, and the newly launched Hooli are all trying to get their act together before the mainnet deployment, which is expected sometime in late April or early May 2025. Because in the world of crypto, patience is a virtue. Or so they say. ⏳
“BTC has found some support at the $80K, but that seems tenuous at best,” said the traders at QCP Capital, who are probably sipping coffee and trying to look smart while they wait for the Fed to make up its mind. “We won’t attempt to call the exact moment when the music stops,” they added, which is basically the crypto equivalent of saying, “We have no idea what’s going to happen.” 🎶
Meanwhile, Ryan Lee from Bitget Research chimed in, saying, “The FOMC outcome could either trigger a recovery if dovish or deepen the correction if hawkish.” Translation: Bitcoin’s short-term future is as uncertain as the weather in April. 🌦️
So, there you have it. Ether’s zooming, Dogecoin’s memeing, Bitcoin’s sweating, and gold’s shining. All while the Fed sits in a room somewhere, probably debating whether to raise rates or just order pizza. 🍕
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2025-03-19 15:19