Crypto Bombshell

Buckle up, folks! šŸš€ Bitwise CIO spills the beans: UNI, ETH, and XRP are about to revolutionize value capture!

Crypto Crooks & Cash Couriers: UK’s Wild Crime Comedy! šŸŽ­šŸ’°

The UK’s finest are on a mission to dismantle these crypto-criminal masterminds, and guess what? Cash couriers are their favorite punching bag. Sal Melki, the Deputy Director for Economic Crime at the National Crime Agency (NCA), calls them ā€œintrinsicā€ to the whole shebang. Intrinsic? More like ā€œin-trouble-isticā€! šŸ˜‚

šŸš€ VeChain’s Heroic Leap to Compliance: A Laughter-Fueled Tale

Lo and behold! VeChain has unveiled a grand regulatory achievement. Their Hayabusa upgrade, much like a magician’s punchline, now fits perfectly into the EU’s Markets in Crypto-Assets (MiCA) framework. This accomplishment-a true testament to the absurdity of regulations-untangled the once chaotic knot of regulatory bureaucracy.

Disney+ Just Renewed Its 5th MCU Show for a Season 2

According to reports from Scooper Daniel Richtman, Marvel Studios is planning a second season of Marvel Zombies on Disney+. The show’s strong viewership numbers during its first five days reportedly impressed Disney, and a source at Marvel Animation indicated back in September that they were already thinking about future stories within the Marvel Zombies world.

TAO’s Tumble: Will Bittensor Survive or Get Squashed Like a Bug? 🐜

Spot Taker CVD leaned sell-heavy, which is fancy talk for “everyone’s running for the exits like the building’s on fire.” And the rising volume? Oh, that’s just aggressive market-order selling-not the kind of accumulation you’d hope for unless you enjoy watching your money vanish like a magician’s rabbit. šŸŽ©šŸ‡

Plague of Plunging Bitcoin: Madness in Markets

Behold! The market makers-those pawns in a desperate gambit-found their liquidity trampled by the glitch’s cruel jest. A stablecoin, once noble, wavered from its $1 tether like a drunkard’s waltz, igniting Auto-Deleveraging’s inferno. Accountants weep, balance sheets shatter, and the bears? They grin, sipping espresso on the precipice. ā˜•šŸ’„

Top gainers and losers

Most profitable crypto: Tensor (TNSR), Grass (GRASS), Maverick Protocol (MAV), Acet (ACT), ECOMI (OMI), Dymension (DYM), Solayer (LAYER), Comedian (BAN), Gigachad (GIGA), ONFA (OFT).