The Wild, Wacky World of Wintermute’s American Dream 🤔

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Well, folks, the crypto train isn’t just chugging along—it’s barreling full throttle into the U.S., and Wintermute, the reigning wizard of cryptocurrency market-making, is riding shotgun. Buckle up, America: Wintermute is bringing its digital bag of tricks to the land of apple pie and bewildering tax codes. 🍎🧾

The brains behind Wintermute, Evgeny Gaevoy, spilled the beans (and probably some digital coins) during his chinwag with Bloomberg at the Consensus crypto conference in Hong Kong. The plan? Set up shop in the Big Apple and roll out shiny new products for U.S. crypto enthusiasts, because apparently, just ‘existing’ isn’t enough. Way to keep busy, guys! 🗽💼

More Staff, More Fun, More… Regulations?

Wintermute is gearing up for a U.S. invasion (figuratively speaking, of course). With a workforce of 130 crypto geniuses, they’re considering adding five or ten more troopers. Ambitious? Sure. Overconfident? Possibly. They just completed a Tencent-juiced funding round that was shrouded in secrecy. How much did they raise? Nobody knows. Apparently, the first rule of Wintermute Club is: You don’t talk about Wintermute’s bank account… unless you’re Tencent. 🤷‍♂️💳

Quick flashback: Back in the day (2021, to be precise), Wintermute snagged $20 million during a Series B funding spectacular led by Lightspeed Ventures. Oh, Pantera Capital and Hack VC tagged along, too, waving digital pom-poms from the sidelines. Seems like fundraising is Wintermute’s side hustle between… you know, dominating crypto markets. 🤑📈

And Then There Was Trump (Cue Dramatic Music) 🎺😲

Ah yes, the crypto world’s best frenemy, Donald Trump, is now in the driver’s seat, apparently rolling out the red carpet for blockchain bros and HODL warriors. While most presidents might dream of legacy infrastructure projects, Trump seems to be dreaming of decentralized futuristic currencies. You do you, Don. 👍🤷‍♀️

Under the not-so-gentle reign of the SEC’s former chair, Gary Gensler, crypto companies were pretty much shown the door—or shoved out of it, lawsuit in hand. Remember Kraken? Yeah, they got slapped with a $30 million fine in early 2023 for daring to let Americans stake their crypto loot. Shame on you, Kraken, for… doing whatever that means. 🦑💸

But it’s 2024, and life’s a new adventure! Kraken has recently resurrected its staking services across 37 states and two territories. Redemption arc complete. Someone fetch them a medal or a mint condition NFT collectible! 🏅🎉

In conclusion, my fellow digital wanderers, Wintermute’s American odyssey looks poised to mix a splash of innovation, a dollop of chaos, and probably a dash of legal headaches. Time will tell if this bet pays off, but hey, at least the U.S. gets a front-row seat to crypto’s latest reality show. Pass the popcorn. 🍿💥

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2025-02-20 00:22