The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap: Hot Diggity Dogs

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On this week’s episode of our beloved TV show, “Rich Women, Making Moves,” these affluent women engaged in various activities. They hosted emotional conversations about fertility with their cousins, while their staff diligently arranged 1,347 mini crystals on a hand mirror for an Instagram post prop at the kitchen island. They bid farewell to their reserved mothers, who reluctantly uttered “I love you” on camera to ensure it wouldn’t be said at their funerals that they never expressed their affection. They displayed their red, white, and blue Birkins at a Fourth of July gathering, which included at least a dozen children and their parents. However, these attendees were mysteriously absent from the filming, as if Dorit had offered them hot dogs and watermelon vodka drinks before politely sending them on their way.

Primarily, the women were seen indulging in hot dogs, but let’s clarify that was only my friend Erika Jayne. I find myself more connected to Erika Jayne in this episode than any other Housewife. Just like her, I don’t particularly enjoy hot dogs, but once a year, I crave an authentic American barbecue filled with hot dogs, hamburgers, potato salad, corn on the cob, watermelon, and banana pudding. Erika was present at this gathering not for drama, but for her annual hot dog, a full-sugar Coke, and pushing others to move past their nonsense because she’s tired of the repetitive arguments every week. In many ways, Erika is me, particularly due to our shared affection for showing up at parties dressed in “provocative American” attire.

At Dorit’s Fourth of July party, many disagreements occurred, largely due to Dorit herself. It all begins when she goes upstairs to untangle her body chain. If you’ve ever owned one, which I believe is true for most of us reading this recap, you know how easily and frustratingly tangled they can become. During this time, Sutton was left waiting downstairs for nearly 45 minutes while Dorit sorted out her body chain. This wait time surpassed the duration she made Kyle wait during glam preparations, but it wasn’t as long as she kept Teddi Mellencamp waiting at a bistro drinking lukewarm water.

Dorit and Sutton don’t get along so well, but things got awkward quickly when Dorit tried to grab Sutton’s tiny baby blue Kelly bag, similar to a Birkin but smaller, saying she thought Sutton owed it to her. It was obviously a joke, but one that didn’t resonate. Sutton replied that she didn’t think she owed the bag to Dorit, but Dorit persisted, holding onto the bag and giving Sutton a look that suggested Don’t even think about touching this bag, or I’ll get Jagger and/or Phoenix to bite your arm off. In essence, Dorit made the situation uncomfortable. She prolonged it unnecessarily, and any enjoyment from the joke was quickly overshadowed, like old Cheesecake Factory leftovers left forgotten in the fridge.

In a humorous yet misguided attempt to tease, Dorit playfully questions Garcelle about Sutton’s drink, creating a joke that seems more awkward than amusing given the history between them. As they sit outside in sweltering heat (almost as hot as a boy band!), Garcelle inquires about Sutton’s beverage, to which Sutton responds it’s a watermelon coconut cocktail. Curious if there’s alcohol in it, Garcelle asks. Dorit then interjects, subtly implying that Sutton drinks frequently by repeating Garcelle’s question, but this joke feels flat due to its strange phrasing, the ongoing tensions between Dorit and Sutton throughout the season, and the lingering memories of Dorit’s behavior regarding Sutton’s drinking habits from the previous season.

Sutton finds Dorit’s joke unfunny for two reasons: firstly, she feels her sense of humor was removed around her 38th birthday, and secondly, the delivery lacked amusement and came across as accusatory. In response, Sutton says, “Oh, Dorit, be quiet. You’re such a bitch.” Unfortunately, this reaction is as unsuccessful as Dorit’s joke. Sutton acknowledges that her response was a petty remark, but she allows herself to get drawn into the argument instead of defusing it. If Sutton had responded with something like, “Yeah, Dorit, I guess you could say that about me being quiet too,” she could have avoided escalating the situation and kept things lighthearted. However, Sutton’s reaction is as light as a pair of black-out curtains during an eclipse – not at all.

It’s obvious that another one of Sutton’s stormy exits is imminent, this time due to her feeling unwelcome in Dorit’s home. Frankly, Dorit is correct – it’s not appropriate to call someone a rude name in their own house. I once had a roommate with a porn star boyfriend who casually urinated in our apartment with the door open! Needless to say, I gave him a piece of my mind so forcefully that he fled down 9th Avenue all the way to the Hudson. If he’d dared to call me a derogatory name, let’s just say he would have had quite the journey back from a trip around our solar system after I retaliated with a well-aimed punch to his (certainly attractive) face. It may not be polite, but still, Sutton is the one who feels wronged, Sutton is the one who’s hurt, and Sutton is the one who’s vulnerable in this situation.

In the midst of our movie night, as I’m about to leave, Sutton hastily tries to halt me, while Garcelle shouts to the bartender for a watermelon and vodka, promising she’ll be back in a jiffy. Yet, she never comes back to claim her drink because Sutton declares it revolting. As we try to soothe Sutton once more, Kyle recalls our past spat at Boz’s spa party, where I stormed out, and now that Sutton’s repeating the act, Kyle seems unfazed. But this is a pattern we’ve seen before with Sutton – recall the live performance of Magic Mike? Whenever she feels uneasy, she makes a beeline for the exit, drawing attention away from the event so that all the women can comfort her delicate sensibilities and help navigate through a turmoil entirely of her own creation.

Boz, who has a knack for understanding situations quickly, walks in while the group of Garcelle, Kyle, Sutton, Erika, and Kathy Hilton are gathered by the front door, examining numerous pictures of PK. Boz notices a papercut on his eyelid as he enters. Feeling it’s impolite to stay outside crashing their friend’s party and wasting battery power on portable fans in the air conditioning, he asks them all to come inside. After Garcelle scolds him for defending Dorit, Boz responds, “It seems rude. If you all want to pamper her, then go ahead and do it.

Absolutely, Boz, you hit the nail on the head! It’s high time they stopped pampering Sutton as if she were some delicate flower. Her antics would make one think her name was actually Daisy, given how often they cater to her every whim. She sets the stage for conflict, and yet they always step in to soothe her feelings. What’s more, it’s puzzling why they keep getting drawn into Sutton’s dramas. But alas, no matter their attempts, Sutton storms off, casting blame on her success compared to Dorit’s struggles. Now hold up a minute. A quick search shows the Sutton Boutique is temporarily closed. Is it flourishing or merely surviving? And isn’t it odd that Sutton often speaks of her messy divorce, hiring forensic accountants, and her husband making things difficult for her? That doesn’t sound like a clean split to me. I’m sorry, Sutton, but I don’t believe Dorit envies you; rather, she finds you tiresome and prefers not to be called a bitch. But well played, Sutton, you’ve certainly managed to stir things up!

Despite Dorit urging the other women to remind Sutton about their bond within the group, Sutton climbs into her car and sobs all the way home, releasing her frustration by letting a mouse go. The tension then shifts towards Boz, as Garcelle once more advises her to stop defending Dorit. Fortunately, Erika momentarily pauses her hot dog to comment, “Mmmhhhfffaa hahh fffmmmhhaaaaa.” The women scold her for eating while speaking, but she retorts, “Haven’t you been Sutton’s representative for quite some time, Garcelle?” It seems she hit a nerve there.

The conversation shifts towards Boz’s claim that Kyle has been distant towards her. Kyle denies this and wishes to challenge the accusation, but I find myself siding with Boz. I believe Boz wasn’t being malicious; instead, she was expressing her difficulty in connecting with Kyle. She sought Kathy’s advice to address the issue. While it seemed like Boz labeled Kyle as cold, she actually wants to resolve this. I think the motive behind the statement is crucial. As Dorit tries to support her friend, a disagreement between Dorit and Kyle ensues. Erika, nearby, grabs another drink and another hot dog while watching the exchange unfold at the party.

As their argument nears its peak, Dorit leads Kyle off for some private time. Kyle looks around at the disarray – the clothes strewn everywhere on makeshift racks, shoes out of their boxes, empty bottles of whatever that Jake Paul drink is scattered about – and she’s aghast. She recognizes that Dorit is in a state because she has let things get messy. (For future Housewives: the one who brings a genuine hoarding storyline to the table earns an immediate pass into the Housewives Institutes Hall of Fame and the Mental Health Wing.)

Ultimately, these two companions, these two women, settle down for a heartfelt conversation. Dorit inquires whether Kyle is contemplating reconciling with Mo, and Kyle expresses her exasperation with being trapped in a state of uncertainty, stating that if they’re not reuniting, she desires a divorce. Kyle also reveals that Mo persistently argues it’s premature to discuss divorce, yet he appears to be making advances towards a fledgling model at a Greek airport. Dorit confides that her separation took her unawares, and she feels as though the past few weeks have been more about managing the pain rather than strategizing for the divorce itself.

In simpler terms, this passage describes two friends reminiscing about their past, particularly their encounters with two unintelligent individuals who have moved on from them. The friends are now discussing how to criticize these individuals, with one friend wishing they could move forward like the ones who left them, and the other emphasizing the importance of living life. The passage suggests that the friends seem to be starting to do so, after a long period of stagnation.

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2025-02-19 06:54