😱💸 Altcoins Soar as Coinbase Embraces Ethereum’s Children 💸😱

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In a grand display of cryptocurrency alchemy, the almighty Coinbase has deigned to sprinkle its golden touch upon three humble Ethereum-based altcoins, causing them to ascend to the heavens like so many Icaruses.

With a tweet that echoed through the digital canyons of social media platform X, Coinbase declared its intention to embrace the decentralized roll-up protocol AltLayer (ALT), the financial alchemist Pendle (PENDLE), and the educational gaming maestro Layer3 (L3). This pronouncement came but a week after these lucky tokens were anointed on the sacred listing roadmap.

AltLayer, a protocol that wraps scalability in a rollup and serves it on a silver platter, danced from the depths of $0.037 on March 26th to a fleeting peak of $0.041 the very next day. It has since taken a breather and is currently lounging at $0.0407, a modest 8.3% gain for the day. Such volatility is as predictable as a Russian winter.

Pendle, a project that turns yields into tokens with the wave of a magic wand, also partook in the festivities. It soared from a lowly $2.83 to a giddy $2.99 in the blink of an eye. It too has come back down to earth, currently trading at $2.95, a 3.7% gain in the last 24 hours. One wonders if it’s all just a pendulum swing.

L3, the gamified pedagogue of Web3, leapt from a March 26th low of $0.087 to a peak of $0.106, proving that learning can indeed be fun and profitable. As of this writing, it’s still riding high at $0.104, a 17.5% gain for the day. Who knew education could be such a rollercoaster?

This whole charade began when Coinbase first anointed these altcoins on its listing roadmap, a document that promises transparency but often feels like a roadmap to the stars. The digital assets rallied then, and rally they do once more, as if by magic.

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2025-03-28 01:02