Oh, what a scrumdiddlyumptious mess we’re in! America’s crypto circus is popping like a giant gummy bear, and everyone’s scrambling for a piece of the digital pie. 🍰 Federal bigwigs are finally waking up, sniffing the air, and realizing they’ve got to sort out this crypto malarkey before it all goes wonky. 🎪
The Great Crypto Push: A Tale of Urgent Nonsense
Imagine a pack of crypto enthusiasts, led by the Solana Policy Institute, marching up to the White House like a bunch of overexcited squirrels. 🌰 They’ve got a coalition of 65+ crypto organizations in tow, all chanting in unison: “Trump, oh Trump, save our blockchain dreams!” 🗣️ Yes, you heard that right-even the blockchain wants a piece of the Trump drama. 🍿
On November 20, the Solana gang tweeted (or should we say, X-ed) with all the gravitas of a circus ringmaster: 🎪
“65+ crypto organizations, from fancy trade associations to code-wielding wizards, investors, and advocates, have spoken: It’s time for the feds to stop twiddling their thumbs and do something! 📜✨”
Their letter to the White House reads like a wish list from a crypto Santa Claus. 🎅 They want tax rules rewritten (because who doesn’t love a good tax loophole? 🕳️), mining and staking guidance revised (because miners need love too), and stablecoin taxation sorted out before anyone loses their marbles. 🧩 Oh, and let’s not forget charitable donations-apparently, crypto wants to play nice with the taxman. 🤝
The letter also demands that digital assets be treated like commodities (because why not?), and that cryptographic engineering gets the respect it deserves. 🛠️ The coalition’s message is clear: “The roadmap’s here, you numskulls! Now get cracking!” 🛣️
“The roadmap exists. Now agencies must act to cement American leadership in crypto.”
But wait, there’s more! The crypto crew wants the SEC to stop being a party pooper and create safe harbors for open-source development. 🛡️ They’re also demanding self-custody protections (because who trusts banks anyway? 🏦) and more wiggle room for decentralized finance. DeFi, they say, should be as free as a bird-or at least as free as a bird in a very large, well-regulated cage. 🐦
And let’s not forget the Roman Storm case. The crypto world is up in arms, shouting, “End regulation by prosecution! Let code be free!” 🦅 Critics, of course, are rolling their eyes, muttering about enforcement complications. But crypto advocates insist that clear rules will make the market as liquid as a chocolate river-and just as delicious. 🍫
FAQ ⏰
- What’s all the fuss about?
Crypto bigwigs want Trump to wave his magic wand and bring clarity to taxes, regulations, and enforcement. 🪄 - What’s on their tax wish list?
Revising mining rules, sorting out wrapping and bridging, and hitting pause on Section 6050I. 📜 - What do they want from the SEC?
Safe harbors for open-source, stronger self-custody, and more DeFi freedom. 🛡️ - Why the fuss over Roman Storm?
They’re fighting to protect code publication and end regulation by prosecution. 🚫⚖️
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2025-11-22 07:58