Trump & Crypto: A Match Made…? 🤯

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Donald Trump, in a move that has absolutely nobody surprised (except maybe the pigeons), plans to nominate Michael Selig, current crypto legal counsel for the SEC, as the next Chair of the CFTC.

Yes, you read that correctly. The President has decided that the best way to regulate digital assets is to put someone who’s been regulating them from the inside in charge of a different regulatory body. It’s a cunning plan, really. Perfectly logical. Like teaching a goldfish to fly. 🐠

Administration Signals Alignment Between Key Regulators (or Possibly Just Confusion)

Apparently, Selig has been schmoozing with SEC Chairman Paul Atkins. Which means… what, exactly? That they both like spreadsheets? That they share a fondness for particularly vibrant neckties? The details remain, as always, shrouded in mystery. 🧐 This “alignment” is supposedly good news for finance and the crypto industry. Or, you know, it could all fall apart tomorrow. It’s the universe, it doesn’t care about your portfolio.

Related Reading: Crypto News: Crypto Market Faces Uncertainty as Trump Ends Trade Talks with Canada | Live Bitcoin News

The digital asset industry is taking center stage, and regulatory pressures are mounting globally. But fear not! The Trump administration is here, with… more legislation. Because that’s always the answer, isn’t it? Legislation! It solves everything. Except maybe everything.

The GENIUS Act passed with not a hitch, which is suspicious in itself. And the CLARITY Act is being “enacted” – a wonderfully vague term. Investors are thrilled, presumably because clarity is better than a complete and utter muddle. Though, historically, clarity has a habit of being a temporary state.

And let’s not forget the recent pardon of Binance founder Changpeng Zhao (CZ). Apparently, his prosecution was part of the “previous administration’s war on cryptocurrency”. A war! Like it was some sort of digital skirmish waged with memes and blockchain. The White House confirmed it. It’s all so…well, it’s all happening. 🤷‍♀️

Trump’s CFTC Pick Selig Aligns with Growing Crypto Momentum (Or Possibly Just Lucky Timing)

Selig’s appointment coincides with a surge in enthusiasm for U.S. crypto legislation. Coinbase CEO Brian Armstrong claims they’re “90%” of the way to passage of the CLARITY Act. Ninety percent! That’s the kind of precision you don’t find outside of a Swiss watch factory… or a really optimistic marketing department. The bill passed the House, which is a good start, unless you’re a bill that doesn’t pass the Senate.

Lawmakers are making “major progress” despite a recent government shutdown. Apparently bureaucracy can function even when nobody’s paying attention. The bill aims to clarify which regulator oversees what. That’s right, they’re trying to define the rules after the game has already started. It’s a bold strategy. Let’s see if it pays off.

Armstrong met with senators, including Chuck Schumer, Kirsten Gillibrand, and Cynthia Lummis. The talks were “very productive.” Which, in politician-speak, usually means “we all agreed to disagree politely.” 🙄

The President has been openly supportive of crypto, promising to make America the “crypto capital of the world.” Selecting an SEC crypto lawyer for the CFTC chair is therefore… symbolic. Tremendously, bafflingly symbolic.

Let’s not forget this choice replaces a previous, failed nomination. Brian Quintenz was initially considered, but apparently, Gemini’s Tyler Winklevoss objected. Because, naturally, everything has to be complicated. Selig’s nomination is now crucial for “advancing the regulatory agenda.” Which probably involves more spreadsheets. And neckties. And possibly goldfish.

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2025-10-25 14:37