Quantum Threat? Mow Says Bitcoin’s Safe! 💸🧠

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with the content. The original text has paragraphs and an image. The rewritten text should have the same structure but with Molière’s flair.

For example, the first paragraph: “The Quantum panic made another round this week…” becomes “Ah, the quantum panic returns, with its doomsday clock ticking like a fickle lover! 🧠💸 ‘Bitcoin keys could be cracked by 2028,’ they cry, while Samson Mow, the man who once dared to bet $1 million on BTC, smirks and says, ‘Fear not, dear citizens!'”

Adding sarcasm: “Banks still use weaker encryption and lack a viable upgrade path.” Could be “Banks, those stalwarts of security, still rely on encryption so weak it could be cracked by a toddler with a calculator! 🧮”

Incorporate emojis where appropriate. Also, check for the catch in the original text about quantum systems needing many qubits. Maybe “Quantum systems would require thousands of logical qubits… as if building a castle from sand! 🏰🌀”

Make sure the title is unique and not repeated. Finally, ensure all images are retained. Let me put it all together now.End of Thought (7.24s)



Quantum Threat? Mow Says Bitcoin’s Safe! 💸🧠

Ah, the quantum panic returns, with its doomsday clock ticking like a fickle lover! 🧠💸 ‘Bitcoin keys could be cracked by 2028,’ they cry, while Samson Mow, the man who once dared to bet $1 million on BTC, smirks and says, ‘Fear not, dear citizens!’

Mow, ever the dramatist, insists that if quantum beasts ever grow teeth, they’ll gnaw on traditional banks first-those relics of weak encryption and crumbling infrastructure. 🏦💀 ‘Banks? They’re the easy prey!’ he declares, as if explaining to a child why the dragon isn’t after the princess.

What’s this? Worry about Tether’s reserves? Or Bitcoin’s price? Mow rolls his eyes. ‘Why fret over a single coin when your local bank’s fractional model is a house of cards? 🏗️💸 And equities? They lose 10% yearly like a drunkard’s wallet!’

Do not fret over quantum computers ‘killing Bitcoin’ when the real nightmare is military systems falling to hackers before a single blockchain is touched! 🚀🛡️ ‘The real crisis? A world where nukes are hacked by a teenager in a basement!’

No doomsday for Bitcoin, but there’s a catch

Quantum systems? They’d need thousands of logical qubits and millions of physical ones-like building a spaceship from matchsticks! 🚀🔥 Even under perfect conditions, the runtime? A joke. P2PKH users? They’ll have time to move coins faster than a squirrel dodging a car! 🐿️🚗

Thus, Mow’s thesis: Bitcoin isn’t the weak link in a quantum world. No, the real weakling is everything else-because chaos always starts with the obvious. 🌪️


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2025-12-08 17:50