Crypto News

According to the venerable on-chain oracle, Glassnode, these industrious little investors-those humble souls with nothing more than a grand on hand-have their profitability measured with the Realized Price. Think of it as the ‘average cost’ where they first laid their coins down, a sort of market memory, if you will. When the spot price dances above this elder’s head, our small players revel in gains unseen-akin to a humble pastry chef secretly wealthy from a single éclair. When below, alas, tears and despair! 🥐

Apparently, Bitcoin’s recent plummet to its lowest point in eight months isn’t because Uncle Sam took a nap. 🛌💤 Many had speculated that the macroeconomic jitters from the government shutdown were to blame, but Rational Root-yes, that’s their name-was like, “Nah, not buying it.” During a podcast that probably had more viewers than a cat playing piano on YouTube, they said, “I wouldn’t contribute the drawdown in Bitcoin all to the shutdown of the government.” Groundbreaking stuff, really.

ETF investors here in the States are hovering around their cost basis of $90,146, which is just a fancy way of saying they’re neither winning nor losing-they’re just… existing. Even with $372.8 million fleeing the scene in a single day, total assets haven’t plummeted off a cliff. This suggests the sellers aren’t coming from the ETF markets but from somewhere else entirely. Maybe they’re just tired of Elon Musk’s tweets. 🤷‍♂️ Meanwhile, IBIT is trading near $52, which is roughly the price of a decent sushi dinner in New York City.

With a gaggle of firms prancing into the fray, including the intrepid Canary Capital, the sagacious Franklin Templeton, and that ubiquitous Grayscale, a question as bold as a barney in a bathhouse is once again dueling for attention across the lands of crypto: Might XRP, that spirited contender, gallantly stride beside Ethereum to snatch the No. 2 laurel from its firmly clutched grip?

Should XRP fall below the golden $2 mark, one might say a wave of sorrow, and indeed selling, will bring its price down to $1.9, and potentially to the dregs of $1.61.

In this grand opera of finance, issuers now juggle solana ETFs like firesticks, fueled by investors’ feverish hunger for SOL exposure. 21shares, the crypto ETP maestro, unveiled its TSOL on CBOE, promising U.S. investors a “staked” ride to riches-because who doesn’t want their money dancing for profit? 🕺

Barstool founder Dave Portnoy, a man who fancies himself a “great white shark,” revealed on Nov. 18 that he had seized upon the recent market downturn to acquire $1 million worth of XRP, alongside ethereum (ETH) and bitcoin (BTC) totaling over $1 million. In a video shared on X, he proclaimed, “Blood in the streets, Dave is like a piranha.” 🦈 One wonders if he realizes the streets are paved with his own hubris.

Avalanche (AVAX) technical price analysis, Nov. 19, 2025 | Source: TradingView

On Wednesday, Selig faced lawmakers with the enthusiasm of a man explaining quantum physics to a goldfish. Questions about conflicts of interest? Trivial! Policy views? Merely a footnote in his memoir. Experience? Well, he’s mastered the art of advising digital asset companies-assuming advising means “nodding solemnly while sipping overpriced coffee.” ☕

From the lips of X’s oracles comes a tale of woe: WIF’s market cap has plummeted from $5 billion to a mere $400 million-a fall so dramatic, it makes Anna Karenina’s leap look like a stumble. Is this a meme-asset correction, or a full-blown tragedy? The analyst, with a furrowed brow, declares it the latter. Panic selling, shattered trust, and whispers of internal strife-oh, the intrigue! 🧐📉