Revolut’s $75 Billion Jackpot: Money, Globes, and a Dash of Swagger

On the chilly morning of November 24, 2025, amidst a crowd of suits and the smell of stale coffee, Revolut made it official: the company’s worth a staggering $75 billion. The share sale, which sounded more like a Hollywood movie, was backed by giants like Andreessen Horowitz, Franklin Templeton, T. Rowe Price, and NVentures (yes, NVIDIA’s baby). Apparently, this was the day the employees could finally sell some shares-so maybe their 5 years’ worth of coffee-fueled hustle paid off after all. They’ve been busy expanding, too-Mexico, Colombia, and India are next in line, because why not turn the world into Revolut’s playground?

Ah! The Fall of XRP: A Comedy of Errors and Lost Fortunes

Voici l’affiche de notre pièce: le graphique. Depuis la fin octobre, le nombre de paiements décline plus vite qu’un acteur de théâtre en mal de ridicules, passant du sommet de la scène au plus bas rang de la galerie. Et, mes amis, après une poussée mi-novembre (calmez-vous, ce n’est pas un miracle), le volume d’échanges s’est envolé, puis-boum!-a fait une chute aussi dramatique qu’un comédien tombant du trapèze. Une stabilisation? Allons, mon cher, si le marché voulait bien reprendre, on l’aurait déjà vu agir! 🤔

Buterin Warns: X’s Location Feature Is a Crypto Privacy Fiasco!

Cryptic Drama Unfolds

Lo, Nikita Bier, X’s director of product, hath unveiled this controversial feature on Saturday, touting it as a guardian of platform integrity and a beacon for truth-seekers. 🌟 But Buterin, ever the skeptic, predicts that some shall soon masquerade as citizens of foreign lands. 🌍 Initially, he saw a glimmer of hope-greater visibility into diverse community sentiments-but alas, his optimism waned. 😔

Ethereum’s Quandary: Breakout or Breakdown? 🎭

Graphical representation

La valeur de notre cher Ethereum se trouve à un carrefour critique – ce n’est rien de moins que Matthieu Du Puits ou un point de confusion pour nos philosophes cryptographiques! Une figure semblable à celle d’un sablier chinois apparait sur le graphique des quatre heures, annonçant des nouvelles hautes et basses… Mais là, point d’article d’économie facile…

🚀 DOGE Barks Back as Cats Steal the Show! 😼

The markets, ever fickle, have chosen to ignore the tragic demise of Elon Musk’s D.O.G.E. department, a bureaucratic farce that collapsed like a house of cards. 🏢💥 Yet, DOGE marches on, driven by the blind optimism of the masses and the promise of a new ETF. Ah, the irony of it all!