Crypto News

This drama unfolds just a week after Do Kwon was handed a 15-year vacation in federal prison for his $40 billion crypto fraud. 🏢✨ Truly, the crypto world never fails to entertain!

Now, this wasn’t just any old box – oh no – it had Coinbase’s guardians watching over it, like a dragon guarding gold. Fancy, huh? And they said, “Let’s make it super easy!” No tricky derivatives, just pure, unadulterated SUI – yum! Plus, they even plan to sprinkle some staking magic, making the box spit out extra SUI tokens if you’re lucky. It’s like a money tree with a DJ spinning tunes all day! 🎉🌳

Historically, the BOJ’s tightening shtick has been crypto’s kryptonite. Yen carry trades unwind, liquidity dries up, and crypto markets? Boom, they crash like a toddler off a slide. But this time? Bitcoin’s playing the “I’ve seen it all” card. 🎩

Liquidity? Thinner than a supermodel’s patience during the holidays. Traders? More cautious than a cat near a vacuum cleaner. Everyone’s waiting for a sign, a catalyst, a freaking neon arrow pointing to “BUY” or “SELL,” but so far, it’s all crickets and eggnog. 🥃

On-chain whispers? Gloomy. Derivatives data? Even gloomier. It’s like the financial version of a rainy British picnic – soggy sandwiches, grumpy aunts, and absolutely no sunshine in sight ☔.

VCs, of course, are more than happy to do this, as they get a chunk of the long-term payoff – if there ever is one, of course. Most startups fail, and the business is highly predicated on unicorns to drive venture funds. Because nothing says ‘I’m a visionary’ like betting on a unicorn that might just be a donkey in disguise. 🦄🐴

Like a determined squirrel hoarding acorns for winter, Bitwise dropped a Form S-1 filing on Thursday, officially registering the “Bitwise Sui ETF” with the SEC. One small step for Bitwise, one giant leap for… well, probably just Bitwise.

We had a most felicitous conference with Chairs Tim Scott and John Boozman, who confirm that a markup for Clarity cometh in January. By their leadership, as well as Rep. French Hill and Rep. GT in the House, we are nearer than ever to passing the landmark crypto…

Experts from SynFutures, Brickken, and Cake Wallet said that stablecoins, privacy, tokenized assets, and applied AI shaped adoption through genuine demand rather than speculation. 🧾

Bitwise, the crypto index fund manager with more ideas than a room full of caffeinated developers, has tossed another hat into the ring. This time, it’s a Sui-based ETF, because apparently, Bitcoin and Ethereum weren’t enough to keep them busy. 🌪️