Crypto News

Over 370,000 brave souls (or perhaps misguided gamblers) were swept aside in this grand market sweep, with a total of $1.8 billion evaporating faster than your patience during a tech support call. The market cap took a nosedive of over $150 billion, dropping to a modest $3.95 trillion-because nothing says “just another Tuesday” like Bitcoin falling below a shabby $112,000 and Ether dipping beneath $4,150, reminiscent of mid-August’s less-than-glorious moments.

Investopedia (yes, that’s a real thing) says moving averages are like that one friend who always knows where the party’s at. XRP is hanging out near a tight range, which means traders are basically playing a high-stakes game of “Will it or won’t it?” as they pray XRP doesn’t slide into the abyss.

With a kind of apologetic shrug, Dhairya declared he’s not the boss, which probably disappoints everyone who thought he was the Big Dog. “Just a builder chasing the old Shiba ethos,” he typed, sounding as if he’d rather be building a treehouse than firefighting a breach. “Turns out, I was just a pawn in a game I didn’t even see coming,” he added-probably while scratching his head and wishing he’d fought harder for a leash.

In their press release-which, let’s be honest, reads like a love letter to Ethereum-they boasted about snapping up these coins at an average price of $4,500 each. Now, that’s about 7.25% higher than the current market price of $4,200. 🤑 So, they’re technically underwater, but they’re swimming with the confidence of a man who’s convinced the tide will turn. “Smart move for the long run,” they say. Well, I’ve heard drunks at the saloon say the same thing about their fifth whiskey, so let’s see how this ages.

The task force, unveiled with great fanfare, boasts ambitions to “enhance collaboration” on matters both financial and futuristic. One might wonder if this is merely a more refined way of saying “let’s not let the Europeans dictate the rules.” The partnership, built upon a mutual investment of £1.2 trillion, is a sum so vast it would make even the most thrifty of Regency-era ladies swoon.

In the latest of its cheeky maneuvers, Empery Digital has opted to increase its share repurchase program to the tune of $100 million by snatching up 3.52 million shares worth a pretty penny-$25.9 million to be exact. Well, who wouldn’t want a bit of extra Bitcoin per share under their pillow, right? 🤑

In a Monday proclamation that made the town crier blush, the companies declared an all-stock swaperoo. Semler shareholders, instead of cold hard cash, will get Strive shares-21.05 of ’em for every Semler share, no less! That’s a whopping 210% premium, folks. Somebody’s sleeping on a pile of digital gold tonight. 💰

Bitcoin, that fickle darling of the digital realm, dipped below $111,500, testing the very fabric of its daily demand zone. 🌊

These celestial upgrades, pending the approval of the validators, shall usher in an era of compliant on-chain credit, advanced tokenization of real-world assets, and veils of privacy. A symphony of innovation, orchestrated with the precision of a poet’s quill.

Everyone’s eyeing $0.22 like it’s the holy grail – a little support, a little hope. Resistance sneers at $0.2899; if POL can muster the courage to bounce back, next stops could be $0.3426 or even $0.4209. If not? Well, buckle up for a descent into the depths of $0.20 or lower. Such is life.