Crypto News

The U.S. crypto scene is once again under the microscope-or perhaps the guillotine-after a high-profile pardon reignited debates about fairness, innovation, and whether anyone in Washington actually knows how Bitcoin works. Changpeng Zhao (CZ), the founder of Binance, took to X on Oct. 23 to address his pardon, bestowed by none other than President Donald Trump himself. Reactions ranged from jubilant cheers to the sound of Senator Elizabeth Warren sharpening her digital pitchfork.

Aster, that cheeky decentralized exchange backed by the almighty Binance (you know, the folks who coined the word “to the moon” and then immediately sold their bags 🙃), has decided it loves its own token so much it’s willing to spend most of its hard-earned fees to scoop it up like a magpie stealing shiny spoons.

Ethereum has somehow convinced suits that it’s the “final form of digital trust.” That’s right-the same network that occasionally jacks up gas fees to “buy a small country” levels is now where banks park their trillions. Ted Pillows (yes, that’s his real name, probably) from OKX and MEXC claims ETH’s decentralization is “nearly impossible to replicate.” Sure, Ted. Just like your hairline.

Behold, the recent antics of Ethereum’s price have not gone unnoticed. Investors, those shrewd souls, react with a fervor born of renewed confidence. From the quill of Merlijn The Trader, a sage of the crypto realm, comes a tale of on-chain dynamics tightening like a corset at a Victorian ball. Withdrawals surge, and the exchanges weep, for their coffers grow light. 🏛️💸

On a chilly Friday, October 24, 2025, Telegram announced its latest trick: an integration with Affluent, a TON-based DeFi vault protocol. 🧪✨ This means you can now earn yield through Telegram’s self-custodial wallet, all while pretending to ignore your aunt’s endless cat memes. 🐱

Fresh whispers from the on-chain oracle are tickling the bullish fancy for XRP, as those enormous whales-yes, the ones with wallets deeper than a chocolate river-swoop in to snatch supply from exchanges like greedy children at a sweet shop. CryptoQuant’s exchange reserve gossip reveals a plump drop in XRP lounging on Binance, now idling at a mere 2.73 billion, a far cry from the bloated 3.0 billion-plus earlier this year. 😏 This vanishing act on exchanges? It’s the hallmark of stout-hearted investors piling in, squeezing liquidity tighter than a miser’s fist and priming the pump for a rollicking surge when demand decides to throw a party.

Turns out, Tesla’s income statement now doubles as a crypto ticker tape. Thanks to new accounting rules, every Bitcoin hiccup-er, price swing-gets splashed onto quarterly reports like confetti at a Silicon Valley IPO party. 🎉 Experts spent 2023 preparing for this shift. (Cue dramatic gasp: “Should we wear red or green ties to the board meeting?!”)

Matthew Modabber, the Chief Marketing Officer of Polymarket, has shared that the company is indeed planning to launch its own POLY token, accompanied by an airdrop. You know, the usual “send some tokens your way, and see what happens” strategy. So, for those waiting with bated breath, worry not-an airdrop is on the horizon!

According to a press release dated Oct. 24 (yes, we’re still talking about it), the Worldwide Stablecoin Payment Network (WSPN) has officially launched WSPN Checkout. 📰 It’s like they took stablecoins, gave them a makeover, and said, “You’re going backstage at the ecommerce payment concert.” 🎤

Sygnum Bank and Debifi have cooked up a rather devilish partnership, you see. They’ve just hatched MultiSYG, a fiendishly clever way to lend money against your Bitcoin hoard. And get this-it’s the world’s first such mischief from a properly regulated bank, letting you borrow stodgy fiat cash while using your verifiable Bitcoin as collateral. The kicker? You get to keep a jolly firm grip on those keys, laughing all the way to the bank-or should I say, not quite handing them over like a lamb to the slaughter. Oh, the irony! 😏