Crypto News

Enter Mr. Carmelo Alemán, the crypto oracle with a penchant for dismantling hyperbole. “Leverage,” he declared with the gravitas of a man explaining why his parrot won’t stop quoting Nietzsche, “magnifies both gains and losses. Like a poorly chosen accessory, it can elevate or utterly ruin an ensemble.” The $19 billion figure, he clarified, is the nominal value of bets-akin to declaring your entire wardrobe lost because your hat blew away in the wind. The true losses? A paltry $2.31 billion. Tragic, yes, but hardly worth a standing ovation.

Moreover, I would urge Coinbase to list more @BNBChain projects. @Binance has listed several Base projects. Don’t think Coinbase has listed a single @BNBChain project yet. And it’s a more active chain. Ah, the sweet scent of hypocrisy! 🍿

Ethereum recently recovered the cluster around the 50/100-day MAs after surviving a hard flush into the high $3,700s on the daily. The uptrend is maintained because the 200-day MA lingers like a grumpy old man at a funeral, still sulking at $3,500. A move through $4,220-$4,280 would invalidate that micro downtrend and reopen the gates of $4,500-$4,650, followed by the previous peak. The price currently simmers below a short descending line from the recent local high-like a tea kettle trying to whistle but only managing a sad squeak.

The hype machine around its DeFi testnet and DEX dropped faster than my enthusiasm for small talk at parties. Traders are suddenly playing it safe, freaked out by technical mumbo-jumbo and inflation ghosts haunting the charts. With chaos flying everywhere, everyone’s whispering: Will Pi hit rock bottom or pull a surprise comeback? Spoiler: Probably just more chaos. 😏

Solana, bless its network heart, has been riding high as one of the galaxy’s darlings just behind good old Ethereum, ever since its epic escape from the relegation zone of single-digit prices. This rally, sparked from a stodgy consolidation in Q4 2024, drew admirers thicker than jam on a time-traveling toaster. Alas, that adoration has evaporated faster than an inconvenient plot twist, threatening to yank the price back to recently poked lows. Behold this chart from DefiLama, illustrating a colossal rift between Total Value Locked and Active Addresses-it’s like watching a romantic comedy where the hero and heroine can’t quite synchronize their wristwatches. Not exactly a blueprint for SOL’s healthy frolic upwards, eh? 📊😏

On October 16, CZ-former Binance CEO and current Head of YZi Labs (because one job is so last season)-reacted to Coinbase’s announcement with all the enthusiasm of a kid on Christmas morning. “Woke up to this. Thanks for the support from industry peers,” he gushed, screenshotting comments from crypto celebs like Justin Sun and Kraken. Because nothing says “I’m relevant” like a good old-fashioned humblebrag. 📸🎄

always the life of the party.)

According to the ever-watchful Etherscan, this financial fiasco occurred at the stroke of 3:12 p.m. ET, courtesy of a Paxos hot wallet linked to PayPal’s PYUSD smart contract. The silver lining? They burned the tokens faster than I burn through a bag of chips-within 30 minutes. The whole debacle cost a mere $2.66 in Ethereum gas fees. Talk about cheap thrills! 🍿

Through this alliance, OKX seeks to expand its dominion across the European Economic Area (EEA), cloaking its ventures in the safety and trust of Standard Chartered’s regulated custody services. 🛡️ For in this world, where trust is as fragile as a snowflake in spring, such safeguards are not just desirable-they are essential. Erald Ghoos, the CEO of OKX Europe, proclaims this move as a beacon of security, a regulated haven for institutions navigating Europe’s ever-shifting crypto sands. 🌪️

Tom Lee-chaired BitMine Immersion Technologies didn’t just dip a toe-they dived in headfirst, purchasing 104,336 Ether (ETH), worth a whopping $417 million on Thursday. And how did they do it? Through a little help from Kraken and BitGo, according to Lookonchain. Of course, BitMine isn’t confirming anything, but let’s be real-they’re not shy about making moves.