Iran’s power grid is currently being stress-tested by a bunch of crypto miners who think they’re playing a game of electrical hide-and-seek. Spoiler: they’re losing. Over 95% of the 427,000 devices running rampant are basically electricity bandits, and the grid is screaming for backup. 🤷♂️⚡
The city’s top market regulator, in a move that suggests they’ve consulted the cosmic tea leaves, will now let locally licensed virtual-asset trading platforms (VATPs) share global order books with their overseas cousins. According to Bloomberg, this means your average Hong Kong trader can now theoretically trade with someone’s pet octopus in Nantong, China. 🌐🐙
Ah, Balancer! A classic. In a twist no one saw coming (except for maybe everyone who’s been paying attention), Balancer’s treasury wallets were drained overnight in a multichain exploit, described by PeckShield as a coordinated attack. How charming.
On Nov. 3, Gate released their report (because nothing says “financial transparency” like a spreadsheet full of numbers). As of Oct. 28, their reserves hit $11.67 billion. Their reserve ratio is 124%, which basically means they’re holding extra crypto like it’s the 2021 bull run and they’re trying to outdo Elon. 🚀
Norby’s main beef? XRP’s on-chain activity is about as exciting as watching paint dry. 🦥 “Extremely mediocre,” he said, shading harder than a 2010s Tumblr post. Meanwhile, Solana’s over here flexing with 2.5 million daily active accounts-100x more than XRP’s measly 25,000. 💪 “The fiction is very far ahead of the facts,” he added, basically calling XRP’s roadmap a fanfic. 📖✨
Our Monday marathon is inaugurated with the unassuming releases from the likes of Impossible Cloud Network (ICNT) and StakeStone (STO) . Ah, such insignificant quantities, so small, yet they possess the quaint charm of a debutante ball, expanding ICNT by a modest 5% and STO by a demure 3%-both in the wan light of the predawn hours. Ah, how quaint!
Analysts, ever the doomsayers, now warn that the Bitcoin price crash may escalate, possibly plunging as low as $88,000, if market sentiment doesn’t find its footing. One can only imagine the drama. 🎭
This ripple of uncertainty now plays the fiddle with those miners and their antics, a shift in this mystical on-chain contraption, if you ask me.
Market cap took a tasteful 9.95% stroll upward to $2.13 billion, while trading volumes spiked to an eye-catching $449.92 million in just 24 hours. It’s almost like ICP remembered how to behave-at least temporarily. Interestingly, this rebound happened alongside a bullish divergence on the lower timeframes, even as the broader weekly chart remains as gloomy as a Monday morning post-party. Bulls have seized what seems like control, but how long can they keep the party going? And what does open interest tell us about the next rollercoaster? Well, join me in this delightful deep dive into the chaos.
The European Commission, ever-so-inventive, plans to endow the European Securities and Markets Authority (ESMA) with expanded powers. This will allow for the stewardship of an eclectic mix of institutions-crypto exchanges, stock markets, and clearing houses-united under an EU umbrella. A draft proposal, quite like a mystery letter awaiting its grand revelation, is set to unveil itself in December. 🗓️🎩
