Crypto News

Lo and behold, rumors of sale spread through the society of cryptocurrency with the subtlety of a dinner-party scandal. Yet, Mr. Saylor himself, possessing a patience most admirable, declared ‘HODL,’ a sentiment quite foreign to the bustling markets, yet akin to steadfast Miss Elizabeth Bennet’s resolve-firm and unyielding. “We are ₿uying,” he avowed, much like a gentleman insistent upon his honor, regardless of the rumors that flutter about like gossiping matrons. 📉🤭

So, what’s the big fuss? Well, it turns out that the ever-so-mysterious Federal Reserve is casting some serious doubt on everything. Neel Kashkari, the President of the Federal Reserve Bank of Minneapolis, has made it clear that the future of interest rates is, well, a little… uncertain. Could we have a third rate cut? Maybe. Maybe not. And when the Fed stumbles, the crypto market trips and falls. 🧐

Our dear experts observe that Pi is dancing within a modest right-shoulder pattern-an eavesdrop on a soap opera, really-suggesting pent-up pressure before a grand explosion, or possibly just a loud fart. Right now, it’s perched just below a key breakout zone, where any hope of a rally is thwarted by the ever-present, pillowy sellers. The resistance lane wavers between $0.245 and $0.255, with the main neckline lurking at $0.29 to $0.30, waiting for someone daring enough to cross it. A smooth leap over this would be the signature move for bullish enthusiasts, akin to a teenager finally convincing their parents to buy a pet dragon.

Oh, the sweet sound of rumors swirling in the wind! 😏 Executive Chairman Michael Saylor, ever the voice of reason, has chosen to drown out the cacophony of chatter with his signature calmness. The man is sticking to his guns-no, not selling bitcoins, but rather continuing his “aggressive” accumulation strategy as his company’s stock continues its steep descent.

Ethereum’s ETH had a midlife crisis Thursday-Friday, dropping 10% and making Bitcoin’s $100k dip look like a polite cough. Now it’s clinging to $3,200 like a clingy ex.

Meanwhile, the cryptocurrency market has plummeted into the abyss, a 6% freefall that left Bitcoin (BTC) gasping below $100,000. Traders, now clad in bear suits and sipping honey for breakfast, have abandoned hope of a rate cut, as if the Federal Reserve’s hawkish whispers were the final death knell of optimism. 🐻🍯

So, what’s the scoop? BNB has been on a bit of a downward spiral since early November, dropping around 22% from its shiny October high of $1,370.55. Ouch, right? 🙄

BTC couldn’t even keep its pants up above $100K as Asian markets yawned awake. The Fed’s hawkish vibes ruined everyone’s day-traders ditched rate-cut dreams faster than a Brit dumps tea for coffee. The Dow and S&P? Down 2% and 1.66% respectively. Tech stocks? Abandoned like a parking ticket on a Friday night. Santiment shrugged: “ETFs lost $963.7M-buyers are ghosts, honey.”

The esteemed Mr. Kuo Zhang, Alibaba’s top guy, was seen in the CNBC pages, twinkling with the kind of enthusiasm that only a man about to stake his reputation on a new financial dalliance could muster. His plan? To use what he dubs a “deposit token”-fancy talk for a blockchain-backed IOU-aimed at making international transactions smoother than a jazz band on a summer’s eve. Think of it as a direct claim on a bank’s deposit, treated with the kind of respect usually reserved for a duchess at a ball. 💃

Canary Capital’s spot XRP ETF, yes, XRPC, strutted onto Nasdaq like a cocky kid with a new toy, racking up a cool $58 million on its first day – enough to make even the most hardened investor blink twice. Investors poured in a quarter billion dollars-impressive, if you’re into that sort of thing-bringing in fresh inflows like a stream of thirsty travelers looking for Oases in the desert. The fund? It’s holding real, tangible XRP-no illusions here-and it’s tracking the CF XRP-USD Index. Sounds fancy, right? Well, don’t get too comfortable.