Because, you know, there’s this thing called a death cross looming over the charts like a dark cloud at a barbecue. ☠️ Will the whales outswim it, or will they end up as crypto chum in the water?
In a recent missive from the CryptoQuant platform, the sage minds at XWIN Research Japan-a bastion of crypto enlightenment-have unveiled a tale as twisted as a Gogol novella. Binance, they proclaim, stands unshakable, its reputation gleaming like a polished samovar, even as it reaches the dizzying heights of $1.88 trillion in trading volume. 🏰
Did Novogratz finally lose his wallet in the tumult, or is this just clever cloak-and-dagger? The market rumble is loud: big players tossing coins like they’re hot potatoes, all while their lips whisper “client business”-probably a fancy way of hiding the raw truth beneath the layers of smoke and mirrors.
1⃣ Bitcoin stumbles into November, its pockets lighter after a red October, thanks to Powell’s hawkish caw and a rate cut that felt more like a paper cut. 🦅💸
According to the sagacious Cryptorank, XRP has, over twelve years, averaged an 81.3% leap in November. In 2024, it leapt 281.7%, a performance that makes one wonder if the coin is merely stretching its legs-or preparing for a marathon. The 2013 record of 531.9% remains a ghostly benchmark, a feat even modern investors dare not challenge without a bottle of courage.
On Friday, Glassnode, that digital Cassandra of blockchain analytics, delivered its weekly verdict: traders are betting on stability, though whether it’s faith or fear remains unclear. The Fed’s “hawkish” pivot-a phrase as meaningful as a bureaucrat’s smile-sent Bitcoin into a brief paroxysm of hope, only to collapse under the weight of its own expectations. The BTC Implied Volatility Index, that barometer of trader anxiety, has been inexorably descending, as if traders have collectively decided to trade drama for drudgery. Even the 1M Volatility Risk Premium turned negative, a sign that panic is now overpriced. Glassnode, ever the optimist, insists this will “mean-revert”-a term that sounds less like a prophecy and more like a bureaucratic excuse. 🤡
Sam Bankman-Fried, ever the optimist, insists FTX was never insolvent-just a victim of “bad decisions.” Because, you know, there’s a difference between having no money and just being bad at math. 🎩💸
But wait-here comes the plot twist! While sales were crashing faster than a crypto investor’s hopes and dreams, market participation has been doing squats. NFT buyers are up by a juicy 22.86%, now sitting at 626,341, and sellers have also joined the fun, rising 13.54% to 469,316. Maybe they just love a good rollercoaster ride? 🤷♀️
Amendment No. 4, as it is known, contains details of a decidedly settled nature: the proposed fund is to be listed upon the New York Stock Exchange (NYSE), and the fees for its management are set at a modest 0.34%. One might venture to suggest, though it would be unseemly to be too certain, that these are the very last touches, like ribbons and lace on a finished gown, before the SEC grants its blessing. 🎀
Oh dear, it seems Bitcoin, the world\’s largest cryptocurrency by market capitalization, has rather let us down, old chap. Just like every other top cryptocurrency, it\’s failed to meet the strong bullish expectations for October 📉.
