‘Anaconda’ Review: A Horror of a Comedy

Does the movie Anaconda feature the first-ever on-screen conversation about intellectual property? This new version of the over-the-top 90s horror film follows aspiring filmmakers who obtain the rights to remake Anaconda, reflecting a character’s belief that remakes are now the foundation of big-budget movies.

This scene is intentionally ironic. We’re likely only watching this new movie starring Jack Black and Paul Rudd because someone believed the name Anaconda alone would get people to buy tickets. But it feels sadder than funny, because it highlights how Hollywood now relies on existing brands – not original ideas – to get audiences interested in any kind of movie.

Simply showing funny characters dealing with everyday issues isn’t enough for a movie these days. Now, stories need an over-the-top element – like a battle with a huge computer-generated snake – and clever dialogue that pretends the action has a deeper meaning.

The snake-fighting scenes are a letdown, especially considering how strong the movie starts. The beginning introduces a group of friends from Buffalo, led by Doug, who dreamed of being a filmmaker but ended up as a wedding videographer. He loves sneaking movie references into his work, much to the annoyance of his clients. His boss tries to get him to accept his ordinary life, telling him, “This is a pretty good life, maybe even a great one!”

It would be great if Anaconda were just a fun, cheesy B-movie. But the story gets complicated when Doug’s old friend, Griff (Rudd), a struggling actor, comes home for Doug’s birthday with a surprising gift: the rights to the original Japanese novel that the 1997 film Anaconda—starring Jennifer Lopez and Ice Cube—was based on. That movie followed a film crew in the Amazon who went looking for a tribe but ended up being hunted by the local animals.

Griff is convinced that owning the rights to Anaconda and a budget of under $50,000 will allow them and their two lifelong friends—Kenny, who struggles with addiction (played by Steve Zahn), and Claire, who is recently divorced (played by Thandiwe Newton)—to finally create the movie they’ve always envisioned. The four of them travel to Brazil, where they meet a quirky snake expert (Selton Mello, from I’m Still Here) and unintentionally become involved with a captivating young woman (Daniela Melchior, from The Suicide Squad) who is fleeing dangerous men attempting to seize control of a gold mine.

The movie never explains why a crew of just five people, working with a budget under $50,000, would travel all the way to the Amazon to film a remake of Anaconda. From the moment the characters arrive in Brazil, the plot makes little sense, and the audience is just asked to accept increasingly unbelievable events – including a run-in with a truly enormous snake. It turns out the original Anaconda was more realistic than anyone thought!

The idea of people facing a midlife crisis by making a movie is a good starting point for a comedy. However, the film needs a script that develops its characters beyond the very beginning. After the characters arrive in South America, any deeper themes are abandoned in favor of predictable and uninspired jokes about filmmaking.

With films like the sharp satire The Studio already exploring the world of movie-making, simple jokes about eccentric trainers or actors meddling with their films feel stale. Anaconda (directed and co-written by Tom Gormican, who also made The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent) had a promising idea, but ultimately didn’t live up to its potential.

The four main actors are clearly willing to embrace the absurdity of this film, and I appreciate that. It’s easy to see why they agreed to be in it, even though the movie isn’t perfectly put together. With so few big comedies being made these days, it’s good to see anyone taking a chance on the genre.

The movie Anaconda starts in a realistically rundown Buffalo, New York, with messy, dimly lit indoor scenes and lots of bright sunlight. For a short while, we see Paul Rudd and Eric Black’s characters as genuine friends who’ve reconnected, bonding over their shared passion for film and the way stories can bring people together.

After that, they spend an hour running from a computer-generated snake. It made me feel a little down while watching Anaconda – if this is all modern Hollywood is producing, I wonder if up-and-coming directors would even want to work there anymore?

RATING: 4/10

The Most Underrated Movies of 2025

Ballerina

It’s a bit ironic that a movie called Ballerina doesn’t actually feature much ballet. But with so many action-packed flamethrower battles, graceful dancing feels almost unimportant. Despite rumors of extensive reshoots and a plot that feels somewhat disjointed, this John Wick spin-off delivers incredible action – including what might be the most literal gunfight ever filmed. And the quirky European ski resort setting of the final act is a fun nod to the cult classic Gymkata.

Caught Stealing

Darren Aronofsky’s Caught Stealing was a surprisingly enjoyable film. Released late in August – a typical dumping ground for bad movies – it’s a fun and gritty thriller with a great, old-school New York City atmosphere. The story feels similar to After Hours, and keeps throwing in unexpected twists, especially with a cameo from Griffin Dunne. What really stood out was how nostalgic it felt – seeing Shea Stadium, the old Kim’s Video, or just the fact that a major studio made a smart, adult drama like this.

Good Fortune

Just a few years ago, a movie with stars like Seth Rogen, Keanu Reeves, and Keke Palmer, directed by and featuring Aziz Ansari, would have been expected to make a lot of money in theaters. However, even though movie theaters are struggling overall, comedies are being hit especially hard. Even a likeable film like Good Fortune, which features one of Keanu Reeves’ best performances, only earned $16 million domestically.

In the movie, Ansari and Rogen play a delivery driver and a tech entrepreneur who accidentally switch lives thanks to a mistake made by Reeves’ character – a well-meaning but clumsy guardian angel. Reeves is always great in roles with a supernatural twist, as if he truly comes from another world. It’s delightful watching his character experience simple pleasures, like discovering the joy of a cheeseburger and the sensation of eating for the first time – it’s truly charming.

Highest 2 Lowest

If I had to choose the best supporting actor or actress of 2025, it would be A$AP Rocky in Spike Lee’s Highest 2 Lowest. While the film isn’t Lee’s best work – it starts slowly as Denzel Washington’s character enjoys his success – it truly comes alive when A$AP Rocky appears. He plays a mysterious man who unintentionally kidnaps the driver’s son, and this sets off a chain of events that dramatically changes everything. The scenes between Rocky and Washington are fantastic, and their confrontation in a recording studio is one of the most captivating moments in any film this year.

It’s surprising that A$AP Rocky hasn’t received more awards attention; so far, his only major recognition was a nomination for a Breakthrough Performer Gotham Award, which he didn’t win. Perhaps people simply haven’t seen Highest 2 Lowest yet. If you haven’t, I highly recommend watching that recording studio scene – it perfectly showcases his incredible performance.

Mickey 17

Robert Pattinson delivers a fascinating performance in Mickey 17, playing a character, much like his Batman, who feels fractured and multi-layered. He’s part of a program where ‘expendables’ undertake incredibly dangerous missions vital for colonizing space. The catch? He dies a lot – each time, a new body is ‘printed’ to replace the old. We meet him as his 17th iteration, but a glitch creates an 18th, leading to some truly unsettling complications. Now, Mickey 17 isn’t as perfectly streamlined as Bong Joon-ho’s Parasite, and that may be why it didn’t explode at the box office or with critics. But I think that slight unevenness actually works. With eighteen almost-identical versions of the same man running around, each with their own little quirks, it feels right that the film itself would have a few tonal shifts and mood swings. It’s a bold, ambitious movie, and while it’s not flawless, it’s definitely thought-provoking.

The Naked Gun

While critics generally liked The Naked Gun and it performed decently in theaters, its box office numbers—around $50 million domestically and $50 million worldwide—were underwhelming considering the hype. Many saw the film as a test of whether comedies could still succeed in cinemas, and these results weren’t a major win. That’s surprising, given how funny the reboot was—packed with visual gags, silly jokes, and clever humor, it’s one of the best updates to a classic franchise we’ve seen in recent years, all in a tight 85 minutes.

Nouvelle Vague

Critics loved both of director Richard Linklater’s 2025 films, giving both Nouvelle Vague and Blue Moon a 90% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. However, while Blue Moon had a traditional theatrical release and generated Oscar buzz for its stars Ethan Hawke and Andrew Scott, Nouvelle Vague premiered on Netflix and seems to have quickly disappeared into the vast amount of streaming content.

This is unfortunate, as both films are excellent and work well together, telling mirrored stories about artists. Blue Moon focuses on a great artist in decline, while Nouvelle Vague shows an artist reaching their full potential. One could hope a film about a groundbreaking director like Godard’s Breathless would inspire an equally innovative making-of film, but Nouvelle Vague is actually a fairly standard biography – even more so than Blue Moon, which explores the life of lyricist Lorenz Hart through a difficult night before his death.

Still, a black-and-white, French-language film released on Netflix that makes the French New Wave seem incredibly cool, and might inspire a new generation to explore cinema history, feels like a worthwhile endeavor. (Just be aware that if you’re inspired to watch the original Breathless, you’ll need an HBO Max subscription.)

One of Them Days

While The Naked Gun earned around $100 million worldwide ($50 million domestically and $50 million internationally), the comedy One of Them Days brought in $50 million in the U.S. and $1.8 million elsewhere. The new film centers on Keke Palmer and SZA as roommates in a tough spot: SZA’s boyfriend has spent their rent money, and they’re facing eviction. This creates a frantic race against time, which adds a lot of energy to the movie. The sharp and funny script by Syreeta Singleton delivers joke after joke. With a bit of luck, this could be the start of a series of buddy comedies starring Palmer and SZA – they have fantastic chemistry together.

Tron: Ares

Let’s be honest, Jared Leto is perfectly cast as a thinking app trying to figure out people. While he plays the main character in the new Tron, the movie’s real strengths are its stunning visuals and incredible soundtrack by Nine Inch Nails. The music gives even the most outlandish plot points – which involve a digital world called ‘The Grid’ breaking into our own through 3D printers, believe it or not – a sense of epic scale. This isn’t high art, but if you’re looking for dazzling Tron vehicles, lightcycles speeding through the city, and Jodie Turner-Smith kicking butt as a seriously cool computer program, all set to a Nine Inch Nails beat, you’ll love it.

You’re Cordially Invited

I was genuinely shocked by the negative reaction to You’re Cordially Invited. It’s a funny and charming romantic comedy directed by the creator of Forgetting Sarah Marshall, starring Reese Witherspoon and Will Ferrell – a pairing I was excited to see. The movie has a fun idea – two weddings accidentally double-booked at the same small location – and some really well-done comedic scenes. Yet, it received poor reviews and, according to Rotten Tomatoes (where it scored only 33% on the “Popcornmeter”), audiences didn’t like it much either – even worse than the Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey movie! This year, there were times I felt disconnected from what people seemed to enjoy, but the response to this film was the most baffling. I just don’t understand it.

2025-12-23 20:28