The Worst ‘Star Trek’ Movies Ever

The Star Trek’s well-known Prime Directive dictates that the team aboard the U.S.S. Enterprise should refrain from meddling in or influencing the natural course of a less advanced civilization’s scientific and cultural advancements on their home planet.

The Prime Directive for Star Trek fans: Love the even-numbered films, hate the odd-numbered ones.

It was widely held among Star Trek enthusiasts from that era that the even-numbered movies, such as Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, were well-made. However, they felt that the odd-numbered films, like Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, lacked quality.

Apart from the even-numbered ones not always being fantastic, some odd-numbered ones had a subtle charm. Similar to my “Star Trek: The Motion Picture – Actually Good” T-shirt that sparks numerous questions before they’re addressed by the shirt itself, the transition from films with the original Star Trek cast to those featuring The Next Generation stars and later a new crew in an alternate timeline led to a complete break from the previous numbering system.

To discover which Star Trek movies are considered the least satisfying, merely looking at the Roman numerals in their titles isn’t enough. You need to watch and evaluate them carefully, understanding their themes (or, more concerningly, recognizing when they seem to lack any meaningful theme). While Star Trek has given us some truly enjoyable space journeys, these five films – ranked from relatively acceptable to akin to being tormented by the empathetic Vians from the original Star Trek episode “The Empath” – are generally considered less successful.

The Worst Star Trek Movies

5. Star Trek: Insurrection (1998)

The strongest point in favor of ‘Star Trek: Insurrection’ among the ‘Next Generation’ films is that it seems closest to an episode of ‘The Next Generation’. However, its weakest aspect is that it doesn’t stand out as a particularly remarkable episode. The plot, which revolves around the Enterprise assisting a celibate alien race on a radiation-soaked planet that induces extreme sexual desire, could have resulted in an exciting movie. Unfortunately, this intriguing premise primarily serves as a backdrop for a typical (and chaste) ‘Next Generation’ storyline. Let’s make ‘Star Trek’ more sensual!”

This version maintains the original’s tone and meaning while using simpler sentence structures and avoiding jargon to make it easier to read.

4. Star Trek: Generations (1994)

In this interwoven narrative, the casts from different eras of “Star Trek” meet, creating an uneven transition. Just three original “Trek” actors agreed to reappear, with Kirk, played by Shatner, getting the most screen time. The “TNG” crew and their sets seem to be straining under the weight of the big screen, while Malcolm McDowell serves as a typical “Trek” antagonist, pursuing a powerful cosmic force. However, Stewart and Shatner share some enjoyable moments in their limited scenes together.

3. Star Trek: Into Darkness (2013)

This film contains several delightful character interactions, entertaining nods to the show’s past, and some breathtaking views of the U.S.S. Enterprise. However, enjoying these aspects requires navigating through a portion of the movie featuring Benedict Cumberbatch as John Harrison/[Character’s Secret Identity Redacted], which I find rather unintelligent. His plot is illogical, his mysterious benefactor’s scheme is nonsensical, the way Kirk and Spock thwart him seems far-fetched, and the repetition of scenes from Wrath of Khan feels incredibly unnecessary.

2. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (1989)

Although they might seem cheesy, I find the campfire conversations between Kirk, Spock, and Bones compelling in this instance, and the idea of the Starship Enterprise departing to search for a divine entity aligns well with the atmosphere of the original Star Trek.

The key aspect that stands out is Spock’s story arc, which is usually the most captivating part of a classic Trek film. In this case, he’s at odds with his previously unmentioned half-brother Sybok (Laurence Luckinbill), and the characters seem to hail from disparate realms. It’s not coincidental that the least effective Spock movie is also the one directed by William Shatner.

1. Star Trek: Nemesis (2002)

In a thought-provoking idea for a “Star Trek” movie, Captain Picard faces his evil counterpart. Unfortunately, this intriguing premise was poorly executed. Instead of utilizing makeup or special effects to portray Stewart’s doppelganger, they opted for a young British actor who bore no resemblance to Patrick Stewart. To make matters worse, Tom Hardy, now a prominent figure in his own right, played the clone. Even if this was the sole film Hardy ever made, the concept would still have fallen flat.

The decision to shave Tom Hardy’s head, presumably to resemble Patrick Stewart who is bald, seems questionable given that Picard didn’t start losing his hair until later in life. An amusing incongruity arises when Captain Picard reminisces about his youth, viewing a photograph of himself from Starfleet Academy – and it’s a picture of a completely bald Tom Hardy! This moment is undeniably one of the most unintentionally humorous instances in “Star Trek.”

Add to this a convoluted plot that defies logic (including Hardy’s clone somehow acquiring a prototype robot identical to Data and using it to lead the Enterprise into a complex trap), and you have what is arguably the worst “Star Trek” film ever produced.

80s Movies That Could Never Be Made Today

Big (1988)

In this movie, although individual recollections may vary, the following is accurate: Tom Hanks portrays an older version of Josh Baskin, a 12-year-old boy who makes a wish to be big at a carnival game. The wish is granted, and Hanks’ Josh flees home for New York City, where he lands a job at a toy company. The story becomes peculiar when it involves Josh deceiving his family into believing he has been kidnapped for months, all while living in luxury in Soho without much regard for his mother. By the end of the film, he also pursues a romantic relationship with one of his coworkers (Elizabeth Perkins’ character). Although not explicitly shown onscreen, it is heavily implied that the underage Josh has engaged in adult relationships. Released in the 1980s, this movie became a massive box office success and catapulted Tom Hanks to nationwide adoration. The 1980s were certainly an unusual decade.

Can’t Buy Me Love (1987)

80’s movies often show uncool individuals attempting to gain entry into popular social groups through deceit or money. In the movie “Can’t Buy Me Love”, a socially awkward character (portrayed by Patrick Dempsey, known for his geeky roles) uses the $1,000 he saved from working on a telescope to instead bribe a trendy girl (Amanda Peterson) to pretend they are dating. The scheme proves successful, and soon Dempsey’s character becomes so popular that he behaves like an arrogant jerk towards others. The film seems to suggest that money can buy love, and people will tolerate obnoxious behavior if the individual believes they possess inherent goodness, which may not resonate as strongly nowadays.

Dream a Little Dream (1989)

As a fan, I’d like to discuss a unique and uncomfortable aspect in the ’80s movie, “Dream a Little Dream“. While Corey Feldman’s Michael Jackson impersonation sequence might grab attention initially, it’s the darker subplot that truly stands out. The story revolves around Lainie (Meredith Salenger), a teenage girl who’s trapped in an abusive relationship. A classmate of hers (Corey Feldman, though he’s essentially possessed by an old man portrayed by Jason Robards) develops feelings for her and tries to help her escape the toxic relationship.

The plot takes a bizarre turn when Lainie’s parents, instead of supporting their daughter, side with the abusive boyfriend, even threatening to move the entire family to a new town because she refused to give in to his demands after he physically harmed her. The situation escalates dramatically when Lainie’s mother drugs her own daughter, supposedly to protect her from trouble. This storyline is so troubling that it led to a sequel being made. It’s a stark reminder of the unconventional and sometimes disturbing themes that were prevalent in ’80s cinema.

Heathers (1989)

In 1989, discussing high school students harming themselves or each other wasn’t as sensitive an issue as it is now. At that time, the movie “Heathers,” which focused on a girl (Winona Ryder) and her boyfriend (Christian Slater) plotting to kill their school rivals in a way that made it appear they had committed suicide, was perceived as dark satire about teenage cliques. Today, violent confrontations among kids aren’t seen as outrageous comedy; rather, they are a distressing reality of modern life. Despite this, “Heathers” remains popular enough to inspire remakes by filmmakers. Interestingly, when the Paramount Network attempted to reboot “Heathers” for television, they found it difficult to do so – the premiere was repeatedly delayed due to real-life school shootings. Eventually, the show did air, but it underwent heavy editing, with the aired finale being a combination of the last two episodes.

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984)

In the initial “Indiana Jones” sequel, Indiana Jones and his companions encounter an Indian Thuggee cult that has forced children from a neighboring village to labor in a mine. This mine is concealed under a palace where Indy attends a gruesome dinner offering strange dishes such as snakes and monkey brains. This portrayal of Indian culture and cuisine, which is both derogatory and inaccurate, might have caused controversy in the 2020s. Moreover, the movie was so unsettling that it alarmed many young audience members, leading the Motion Picture Association to introduce a new PG-13 rating for films that were too intense for a PG rating but not quite suitable for an R rating. It’s hard to imagine a family-focused film today featuring a villain who brutally removes hearts from people’s chests!

Revenge of the Nerds (1984)

In a surprising twist, this long-running comedy series, known for its widespread appeal, exhibits an unexpectedly harsh undertone given its theme of misfits and outcasts. It’s riddled with jokes that are homophobic, racist, and sexist in nature. A significant portion of the plot revolves around a fraternity of nerds seeking retaliation against a sorority for their unkindness, which includes raiding their house and installing hidden cameras to spy on them. The climax involves the leader of the nerds deceivingly posing as a popular girl’s boyfriend, engaging in sexual acts under false pretenses. Remarkably, she falls head over heels in love with him despite his deceitful actions. A remake attempt was made in the mid-2000s, but it ultimately failed to materialize just before production began. This film can only be relevant in today’s era as a gritty reboot that critiques the notion that nerds deserve love, fame, and success solely because they had to endure bullying from a few arrogant jocks.

Short Circuit (1986)

You might recall “Short Circuit” as a delightful comedy featuring a robot coming to life and defying its military programming. However, if it’s been some time since you watched it, you may not remember that the significant secondary character, the roboticist Ben Jabituya, was portrayed by Fisher Stevens in brownface. This character became quite popular, even becoming the (non-robot) lead in the sequel, “Short Circuit 2.” Despite the series’ success in the 1980s, Stevens has since expressed that the role lingers as a regret and stated he would not play it again.

Sixteen Candles (1984)

John Hughes is famously known for creating humorous and compassionate depictions of teenagers in movies such as ‘The Breakfast Club’, ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off’, and ‘Sixteen Candles’. However, it’s worth noting that this sensitivity wasn’t always present; for instance, the character Long Duk Dong from ‘Sixteen Candles’ seems to embody almost every Asian stereotype imaginable. Even a gong sound effect is used whenever he appears on screen. In retrospect, this character has been criticized as a “grotesque stereotype” by Molly Ringwald herself in a piece for the New Yorker, where she also discussed Hughes’ films’ treatment of women and their casual homophobia. These aspects make his works significant relics of their time but not necessarily reflective of our current values.

Soul Man (1986)

In 1986, it’s hard to believe that a comedy focusing entirely on blackface was produced. The film, titled “Soul Man“, follows the story of a self-indulgent college student named Mark (played by C. Thomas Howell). Despite getting accepted into Harvard Law School, his wealthy father refuses to pay for tuition. In a desperate attempt to secure financial aid, Mark applies for a scholarship reserved for African American students. He then resorts to an excessive use of tanning pills and dons a wig in an attempt to pass as black. Amazingly, this questionable disguise works, at least temporarily. The film seems to have good intentions, as it appears to be mocking Mark’s ignorance and the misconception that becoming black grants him a free ticket to Harvard. However, much of the humor is surprisingly insensitive. It’s more likely we’ll see a remake of “Gigli” in the 2020s than a reboot of “Soul Man“.

Zapped! (1982)

In the film “Zapped!”, a teenager acquires telekinetic powers and instead of using them heroically, he employs them to embarrass girls he dislikes by stripping them in public. Surprisingly, this character is portrayed as the main protagonist. After Scott Baio’s character, Barney, gains these supernatural mental abilities in an accidental lab mishap, he spends the following 90 minutes treating most of the women in his life harshly—even the girl at school who shows kindness towards him. (He attempts to lift her shirt and, when she resists, he uses his powers to do so.) While it’s not uncommon for movies to explore sexual themes, “Zapped!” repeatedly makes light of abusive behavior.

2025-01-21 20:54